|
|||||||
A zealous and inspirational figure with a captivating energy that pulls people to her, Internationally renowned Sexual Confidence/Dating Coach, Christine Akiteng is a dazzling icon and a powerful testimony of a merging of ancient and modern cultures. |
|||||||
Comments on all articles by Christine Akiteng (55,056)      Christine Akiteng   Should You Dump A Commitment Phobe? Not Before You Read This vanessa from ny: (15 days 8 hours ago.)  i have read your article about commitment phobia and i understand what you're saying but what about if you're in a relationship for years and the other person still shows signs of being commitment phobic and not ready to commit.It's like the relationship is great until things seem to get a little more serious as far as talking about living together or something of the sort.Is'nt that like trying to have your cake and eat it too.It's like having the perfect love with the perfect mate but no commitment.I think thats wrong! Will Your Ex Come Back Or Contact You Again If You Use No Contact? dfasdf from sdfad: (16 days 5 hours ago.)  ty for this yes it has helped me, i have been with this girl for 5 years and now she says she needs time to figure stuff out and has started datinging and haveing sex with this other guy. It hurts me very much to know this because to this day she says she loves me. IDk what to do but ty for this artical Comment by Christine Akiteng (55,056) Christine Akiteng (14 days 2 hours ago.)This must be hard on you. Let her go, if she's meant to be she'll come back to you, if not someone who deserves someone like you will! Love always has a reason that reason itself doesn't even know. How Likeable Are You? Your Smile Says A Lot Hannah Quinn from Australia: (16 days 14 hours ago.) Christine, I was thinking about the twinkle in the eye as you were describing a real smile. It's very warming to see and does us good. Smiling is important, as witnessed by new parents watching every twitch on their newborn's face as they await that first smile. And babies react more positively to faces that smile, virtually from their very beginning, even with strangers, emphasising how important a genuine smile is to us all. When a salesperson fake smiles at me, my skin crawls. I've been known to cut off my own nose to spite my face and not buy something I really want or went to the shop specifically for in the first place, just because of a fake smile - which is usually accompanied by fake compliments, fake voice, fake everything. Thanks for an interesting article, Cheers, Hannah Comment by Christine Akiteng (55,056) Christine Akiteng (14 days 2 hours ago.)Hannah, where you describing me whan you said "cut off my own nose to spite my face and not buy something I really want... just because of a fake smile" :-)). Like you I am very --may be overly sensitive to fake compliments, fake voice, fake everything. I am one of those people who takes people for who they are -- and when they fake stuff I want to scream "I don't really care that you are not perfect, I am not either!". Many blessings your way!! Comment by Sandra E. Graham (884)   Sandra E. Graham  (16 days 22 hours ago.)Great article, Christine. And you are right about the smile. I think almost anyone can tell when a person's smile truly reaches their eyes; and a truthful smile can make even a homely person beautiful. It is also hard to believe that everyone doesn't want to be liked---at least by someone. I think it is something that becomes embedded in our inner selves when we first begin to associate with peers in school. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us. Sandra Comment by Christine Akiteng (55,056) Christine Akiteng (16 days 17 hours ago.)Thank you, Sandra. I agree with everything you say including the fact that being liked seems to be in our DNA. It makes life so much more worthwhile knowing there is - at least someone who likes us! “I Love You” - How Soon Is Too Soon? Ali from Sheffield: (19 days 6 hours ago.) I've been with my boyfriend for almost a year now. Im in love with him, but he hasn't said it to me yet and i don't want to be the first purely because i don't want him to say it back just for the sake of it. Any advice? Honey Does My Butt Look Big - Never Mind I Love My Big Rounded Butt Comment by Sandra E. Graham (884) Sandra E. Graham (23 days ago.)Great article, Christine. You did a great job of saying what a lot of women would certainly agree with. I wasted many good years of my life worrying about what men thought of my looks and what I could do to make myself more attractive. Finally I, too, reached the realization that the 'spiritual you' is the important one inside there. Great job. Keep up the good work. SEG Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Comment by Creative Blogger (3,587)   Creative Blogger (23 days 4 hours ago.)I agree 100% Christine, I have seen many women who society would consider obese who exude sexuality and attractiveness and it is all about how they move and carry themselves. The phrase ' u work it girl!' comes to mind ;) Comment by Creative Blogger (3,587) Creative Blogger (24 days 3 hours ago.)Hi Christine, sorry, my use of words has led to a misunderstanding! I didn't find your article at all offensive. I just meant to say that this 'butt' concern re white guys is not unique to black women! We all have butt concerns re those same guys. :) Men on the other hand like bottoms, and a nice round bottom is better than a flat one any day! I am about to embark on a 'butt shaping program' myself very soon, based on those same concerns which of course are all in our head, but we are women. I think we are more obsessed with our butts than men are truth be told! Sorry for the confusion!!! Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Creative Blogger: (24 days 15 hours ago.) Hi Christine, not sure I agree with your 'racial' concerns on this one. No woman of any culture is 'made to measure'. There are more overweight white women for example than 'model figure' ones, so they have concerns about their bodies regardless of who they date. Worrying about a big or flat butt is not culture restrictive either. Every woman I know worries about this one, and mostly from what I know of men of any culture, they all like nice perky raised butts ;) I think black women have an edge in this department and are ahead of the game with natural tone and definition, whereas we white women have to go to the gym, do butt crunches, ride horses or be a gymnast to get the same shape. ;) Meanwhile men also worry about their butt shape, especially as we women place ever increasing importance on it. I don't think any race has an edge on mens bottoms, not that I have noticed, but I shall do some research and get back to you! :) Oh happy days. Great read !!" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Why Women Who Wait For A Man To Make The First Move Lose The Man Anonymous: (27 days 2 hours ago.) I am falling in love with my friend, I believe the feeling is mutual. How do I get him to make the first move? How Quickly Do Men Fall In Love? Anonymous: (28 days 4 hours ago.) This article made me want to read the books. Very detail and to the point. I enjoyed it! The Link Between Your Computer And Your Relationship Problems Comment by Ken McCreless (457)   Ken McCreless (35 days 13 hours ago.)Christine, I enjoyed your article. Working out of town a few days a week, I get to fall in love with my wife all over again. Thanx for the info!! Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Barack Obama Dialed My Number - And I am Not Even An American Comment by James P Krehbiel (1,735)  James P Krehbiel (41 days 19 hours ago.)Christine, I would like to weigh-in one more time on your article and this issue. I believe that the melting pot is melting because many of us think that we are one big happy family as evidenced by the unity created after 9/11. However, as a global family we still fear making distinctions based on race, religion and culture because it draws attention to our own vulnerabilites. Some of us victim-posture by claiming that we have been misunderstood even though our paranoia reflects our racism. In a posture of moral superiority, we smuggly smear other cultures, racial groups, religious ideologies and lifestyles to justify our own identity. Without understanding, appreciating and affirming our differences, there will be no genuine moments of colorblindness. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Comment by Teresa Ortiz (2,244)  Teresa Ortiz (41 days 22 hours ago.)Hi Christine, Excellent job. Very honest and straight from the heart. I have always had a problem with racism. As I kid, my mom always told us, as long as we bleed the same color, then we are the same race. But it is true, we learn from watching others and there are unconscious things many of us do that speak hurt to an on-looker. I grew up in the worst parts of L.A. With gangs and such, I found that I was not afraid to stand up to anyone! (White or Mexican that is) until one day I don't remember how old I was, but I was walking down the street and a black man was walking in the opposite direction. Without even thinking, I crossed the street. It was then that the words of my mom rang in my heart and I thought to myself, why did I do that? Becuase it is what people did. I was ashamed. But I learned. We joke amongst our family because we don't quite know what to call ourselves. I have Chinese blood, Spanish blood, Indian Blood and Causian blood. No wonder my mom's motto is "If we bleed the same color, we are the same race" Can't help but wonder if this is what God thinks. Because according the Bible, we were all once the same, but during the days of the tower of babel and Peleg, God sent everyone his own way and confused the languages. After all, dark people are only dark because where they are on the planet, etc.. Skin tone reacts to the sun. It's not that hard to figure out, but it is true man is fallen and capable of much wickedness. Racism is just one of the many problems. Thanks again for a thought provoking article. Sorry I went on so long. God Bless, Teresa Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Jonathan from Columbus, Georgia: (43 days 9 hours ago.) Excellent article, Christine What struck me the most about your article is how applicable Obama's message of unity is to not only Americans but to the entire world. The true essence of Senator Obama's speech is that since a white person will never know what it's like to be black, and a black person will never know what it's like to be white, let's try to look at each other as what we are first, human beings. But whether everyone heard what you, I and so many others heard has a lot to do with the views held by those who listened. The sadness of America, more than racism is that there are few of us who are educated and matured enough to see the wisdom of Obama’s speech and even fewer who are willing to do what it takes to create that perfect union. Loved the article! Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Comment by Creative Blogger (3,587) Creative Blogger (45 days 3 hours ago.)Hi Christine, thank you for your reply. When I say racism exists because to 'err is human' what I mean to say in short is that racism stems at it's most basic form from fear. Fear of difference, fear of a lack of provision as societies expand and provisions can't meet the demand. When this happens people look around and begin the blame game. It can become a last in first out mentality. Prejudice is less to do with colour and more to do with fear. People fear difference and anything that may affect their way of life. When that fear nolonger exists, what may remain is an inherited fear, predjudices passed from parent to child and so on. Racism should not exist but as long as we have fear it perhaps always will. Imagine if tomorrow we were all the same colour, religion etc..would we find reason to dislike our neighbour? Some people would, they might say they aren't the right class, weren't schooled in the right school, don't have the right accent, are too tall, too small, from out of town and so on. It is not just human nature, it is animal nature. Animals behave in the exact same way. Group animals, protect their territory, may kill the offspring of rival groups and so on and so forth. As humans, we can rise above that primitive nature, but it's a long hard road and to be realistic not all humans are at the same level of evolution. Some are compassionate, tolerant and understanding by nature, others are simply not. But that doesn't mean we can' t try to swing the balance away from racism and prejudice in any form. Why Women Say They Want A Good Guy But Sleep With A Bad Boy Anonymous: (45 days 7 hours ago.) Women who prefer bad boys deserve all the abuse they get. They get no sympathy from me. Barack Obama Dialed My Number - And I am Not Even An American Comment by Stephany Springer (21,658)  (45 days 21 hours ago.) Christine, great article. It blows me away that issues of race and skin color still exist. But then I remember that we are still a fallen race and it makes me sad. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Comment by Creative Blogger (3,587) Creative Blogger (46 days ago.)Meanwhile, the human race won't become extinct anytime soon as long as those with the 'power' don't go pressing any buttons! ;) Comment by Creative Blogger (3,587) Creative Blogger (46 days ago.)Excellent article. Though you don't have to be a particular colour to experience racism you just have to be a different colour to the majority where you happen to be, at least that is my experience. I used to live and work in a place in the Uk which was predominantly populated by black and Asian. The result was that I never got served in the shops, had abuse thrown at me in the street and my Asian boss used to call me 'girl' despite the fact I was the GP Surgery Manager! I saw a lot of racism while I was working there towards myself and towards others. Anti- everything they were not basically. Not a pleasant experience and I do sympathise with any group which is a minority for whatever reason, whether it be colour or religion or lifestyle. Prejudice comes in many many forms. I do not actaully think that the west is more or less racist than anywhere else. I know that those outside the west are fairly racist even towards their own people depending upon where they were born, to what family or the depth or shade to their skin. Racism is not unique to any specific group of people, it is human to err and we are all human. Let's hope we can all one day evolve beyond it. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Comment by James P Krehbiel (1,735) James P Krehbiel (46 days 3 hours ago.)Christine, Thank you for drawing attention to the need for all of us to look within and deal with the darkness that keeps us separated from others of different races, cultures and lifestyles. It is interesting to me how those outside this country seem to have a clearer picture about what this country needs to heal its soul. My fear is that many will continue to maintain their reactionary point of view and miss a chance to address this important issue about tolerance and understanding. Thank you for a powerful article. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) 15 Strong Signs He Or She Is In Love With You Marissa D. Corado from Egypt: (46 days 6 hours ago.) Very helpful this article,i like it..thank you so much it gives me more idea...i ask also for the article if you have..Hows my relations to my kids & husband while im working here in abroad?..i am Filipina. Barack Obama Dialed My Number - And I am Not Even An American Hannah from Australia: (46 days 22 hours ago.)  Christine, Amazing article. I was enthralled throughout. You and your friends are strong women and your friendships will only deepen from here on in. I feel the insight I've gained from your honesty will not only stay with me but encourage me to have such conversations with my own friends. So, thank you. Keep shining the light. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Comment by Barbara Clark (383)  Barbara Clark (47 days 3 hours ago.)Excellent article! I am moved by your insights and the courage (like Obama) to openly discuss what many secretly avoid. I particularly like your outlook about using these situations as an opportunity to "educate" your friends, rather than run away from the friendships. I believe it's an excellent way to choose to look at life in general and respond to people's viewpoints that may be different from our own. I believe we always have a choice and I'm glad you chose to share these thoughtful ideas, thoughts and feelings here. Thank you! Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Aaron Taylor from Missouri: (48 days 2 hours ago.)  Excellent article! I didn't know that Ugandan women were stereotyped that way. I was in Uganda a few years back on a preaching trip and I found the people to be virtuous and kind. I too thought that the heart of Obama's speech was getting past the race labels and learning to see each other as human beings. Now whether his character matches his speech, only time will tell. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Seduce and Sexually Turn On Your Date Comment by Creative Blogger (3,587) Creative Blogger (54 days 23 hours ago.)Oh dear Christine, you know your tips on how to eat is exactly how I do eat! Even a single chocolate lasts 5-6 nibbles. I just enjoy food, what can I say ;) 10 Types Of Men Women Don’t Find Attractive jon from middlesbrough: (55 days ago.) number 9 seems to spell me out to a t, but is there really anything i can do about it? Comment by Christine Akiteng (55,056) Christine Akiteng (16 days 17 hours ago.)YES. Overcome your fear of women. But I wish it was as simple as saying "get over it". You need to get to the bottom of why you women scare you so much. Women are just human beings, too. Should You Dump A Commitment Phobe? Not Before You Read This Comment by Creative Blogger (3,587) Creative Blogger (55 days 12 hours ago.)Thanks for your reply Christine and I have since given this some more thought, re those guts of mine! I realise I am the committment phobe you speak of Christine, but I feel it's justified (for all the reasons you list in your article) and you are right what I need is patience from my mate. I find men these days in too much of a rush to move things on. Mentioning marriage after 2-3 months will send me running for the hills! I have been married and divorced twice so I thinks that's a reasonable reaction. They don't dump me though, I dump them, but that said, many who know how I am re this in the first place (I will say on first date, I am NEVER getting married again) may then not take matters forward based on that single comment. Give us women time men! Like Christine says. The idea of marriage after two divorces (as Myla will also appreciate) is a really hard thing to contemplate especially when the last one is still fairly fresh. But as I also say, never say never. It is a matter of time and giving those gut feelings time to balance with good sense. The head and heart need to be in alignment when we've made significant errors of judgement in the past. So while I love being in love, any rapid mention of committment will fill me with fear. Glad you got yourself over this phobia Christine and (I assume) found yourself a good man. Long may it last! ps. I never knew I was a committment phobe till your artilce and subsequent reply gave me food for thought!!! Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Comment by Myla Madson (1,963)  Myla Madson (56 days 1 hour ago.)You've done it againe Christine...made me go and make room for your article on my website. I love yor perspective and commitment to this subject. I'm a family counselor and get so tired of this crazy thing we call love. I know, when I read your articles, I'm in the wrong line of work. You have an obvious passion behind what you do aside from making money. You are so GOOD at what you do because you believe in it 1000%, and I can feel it every time I read your articles. Thanx and keep em' coming! lol Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Comment by Creative Blogger (3,587) Creative Blogger (56 days 2 hours ago.)Is it commitment phobia or really your gut telling you you're with the wrong person? I personally feel that we should go with our guts, never settle and never give up. I've regretted not committing and then found myself in the exact situation you describe, but with time comes memory loss, and we look back with rose tinted spectacles. Hence the sense of regret. Lonliness can also make you feel that way. I have found that with yet more time, those tints fade and we regain a sense of focus once more. Still a few regrets but reassured I did the right thing. Great article Christine. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) How To Make A Deep Sexual Connection Or Spice Up An Old One Comment by Myla Madson (1,963) Myla Madson (63 days 5 hours ago.)You sure give away some of the best content on the web, and I am so thankful for it. Your one of my featured experts at my website (yes, I was sure to keep the links alive ) and as my site grows, I will continue to use your valuable contributions...there is so much garbage out there. I hope it's sending some traffic yor way, your the best! Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) 20 Signs You Found True Love josh from south carolina: (66 days 3 hours ago.) this article was very helpful to me me an my girlfriend have all of these traits but i sholdnt kall her my girlfriend any more she is more than that she is my soul mate 15 Strong Signs He Or She Is In Love With You Roxanne from Cebu City Philippines: (73 days 11 hours ago.) Thanks a lot it gives me strenght to believe that he likes me too.THANK YOU VERY MUCH! I told some of my friends about this and they are so interested to read this article and to leave a public comment,I think my friends like Anjunette will read this article now in their house. GOD GLESS YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HOPE YOU CAN HELP MANY CITIZENS! Donnalee from Cebu City Philippines: (74 days 14 hours ago.) It wasn't enough because he's often not in school but i'll see what it can help i'll just reply in the right time that I will read this again,THANKS! I hope many will comment in a positive way of writing,I hope you can help many citizens as I am. Beyond First Date To Second Or Third Date Anonymous: (75 days ago.)  Not at all. This is basic stuff. It would be great to see some guidance on when it's ok to tell someone how you feel. I've met an awesome woman (finally, I'm 33) after dating quite a few girls that I wasn't interested in (and some who weren't interested in me)... it would be nice to know what she's thinking (I know she's very interested, but would like to know more... It's hard not to call her or to know when to call her. I'd hate to run her off... anyways... Should You Try To Get Your Ex Back Or Move On? Marcus from New Beginings: (79 days ago.) Hi Christine, I noticed most of your recent articles are about "Dating your ex or trying to get back with your ex!! Now I'm not a dating coach or want to be, but to my way of thinking you or your readers should build a bridge and get over it. I think life is much sweeter if you can move on and forget the past esspecially if it's been tainted. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) “I Love You” - How Soon Is Too Soon? Crystal from Ontario: (82 days 16 hours ago.) Yes it was very helpful. Every time i try to tell my bf i love him i cant speak.. what should i do? how can i change that? I get nervous. 15 Strong Signs He Or She Is In Love With You Anonymous: (84 days 19 hours ago.) Good advice. However, I think you should go on a few dates first before thinking about love. The first couple of dates can be very showy and prescribed its only after that people start showing their true colours. 8 Simple Rules For Dating Your Ex Didi from Namibia: (86 days 15 hours ago.) ver much - felt like spending endless hours reading and reading it over and over again. How To Play Hard To Get And Still Get Him Or Her To Fall In Love jane: (91 days 4 hours ago.) um. it was good but the point is guys are confusing!!! i never understand them and im so clueless(still) on what to do! it's exasperating but it may be time to move on :(. How Do You Stop Loving Someone? Claire Wurzbach from United States: (101 days 21 hours ago.) This is a statment question: You see I like this guy and he doesn't know and he is mean to me he emotinally abuses me and i can't let him go and we're not dating what should i do? 15 Strong Signs He Or She Is In Love With You Veronica from Boston, MA: (104 days 4 hours ago.) This article has opened my eyes and has helped me a lot... its answered questions I had doubts about thanks. Wendy from Texarkan, Texas: (108 days 22 hours ago.) This article has helped me to see what could be the start of a great relationship after only one date. The guy I went out with was very open and honest with me on our first date. Was very interested in my life too. Does not mean he is already in love with me; but I see great potential in him. DC from NJ: (114 days 19 hours ago.) i met a great girl! and i know that she is the love of my life!! xox love you katia! How To Play Hard To Get And Still Get Him Or Her To Fall In Love Bradley from United Kingdom: (124 days 5 hours ago.) I agree with Laura from New Jersey as i would like to follow these 'rules' but i need more detail in the questions to ask.. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) Get Your Ex Back - How To Handle The Moving Very Close And Needing Space Anonymous: (125 days 5 hours ago.)  Just stopping by good stuff Antoine CEO SPATE MAGAZINE How To Get And Keep Your Man Or Woman Always Interested In You Anonymous: (125 days 5 hours ago.)  Very interesting Antoine CEO SPATE MAGAZINE How To Play Hard To Get And Still Get Him Or Her To Fall In Love Laura from New Jersey: (126 days 5 hours ago.) I thought it was a good article but I'd like the author to give concrete examples. For instance: "Ask questions with the intention of finding out what makes him or her tick." Such as? What kind of questions should one ask? Another example: "...by doing things that make him or her feel that you truly and genuinely understand him or her as a unique individual." Again, please give examples of what you mean. Also, how does one keep this "hard to get" aura after being married for several years? Thank you for the article! The Dating Double Standard – Why Many Men Have No Shot At Love Anonymous: (126 days 21 hours ago.) Christine, You are right in that I myself have met many men who feel like many women abuse the power they have earned/been given in the dating and relationship game so they feel completely justified in arming themselves with every pickup book tactic and phrase they can get their hands on to "defeat" women, take what they want and throw them to the curb. It is not a good environment for an honest, straight forward woman or man to be in. From my experience, the key to get past it is to let the generalizations go about both sexes and wade back in the dating pool staying with the safer dating options, like those dates that come with a positive word from a friend or good dating coach. One can gradually increase the risk tolerance level until you are winging it with a picture and a paragraph on the web. The real danger I see is that many men are looking at the whole situation saying the risk/reward ratio is grossly out of whack, meaning the benefits they see in having a mate are heavily outweighed by the potential downside, so they decide to go solo. Archer Parish How To Play Hard To Get And Still Get Him Or Her To Fall In Love kacey from ny: (127 days 16 hours ago.) christine, I personally believe in every word that you wrote in this article and would like to let you know how much confidence you've given me to change certain habits that I have. thankyou k.c Are You A Hot and Sexy Woman Or A Beautiful Woman - What’s The Difference? Laura from Dearborn Hgts, MI: (137 days 20 hours ago.) Your article is abosolutely amazingly correct. I've waited for that one guy who calls me beautiful and holds my hand and kisses my forehead, and didn't realize it unitl now. Thank you. 10 Types Of Men Women Don’t Find Attractive Kenneth: (154 days 21 hours ago.) I'm a man with waste length hair and I have no problems interacting with women. Now I know why. I exude none of these traits. Comment by Christine Akiteng (55,056) Christine Akiteng (16 days 17 hours ago.)Good for you!! it takes a man to say I have no problems interacting with women. Are You A Hot and Sexy Woman Or A Beautiful Woman - What’s The Difference? Comment by Scot McKay - Dating Coach (3,360)  Scot McKay - Dating Coach (175 days 13 hours ago.)I wrote an article called "Motherhood Is Hot" about a year and a half ago. Today...right this second...my wife Emily is 9 months pregnant with our son. My opinion has not changed. By the way, "Beautiful", "Sexy" are not interchangeable. It's not one's attitude towards them that differentiates them. They are are wholly separate concepts. One can be one without the other, or both. And "Cute" is yet another separate category, and my personal favorite. Beautiful=Nice To Look At (which could be a material object or a sunset as easily as a human being) Sexy=Inspires sexual desire Cute=Inspires "warm fuzzies" and a desire to show affection So beautiful women can be sexless ("Sears catalog women"). Women who attract men yet cause other women to become so perplexed as to ask "What do those guys SEE in her?" are likely sexy without beauty. Meanwhile, cute women are always trying to be beautiful and/or sexy instead of recognizing and accepting how absoutely powerful the ability to inspire affection truly is. Cute rules. Response from Christine Akiteng (55,056) |
