Lazy, Thy Name Is Housewife For some reason, the vacuum cleaner died the other day when I was cleaning the sofas. While I was using the hose extension, the rollers ate up and melted the throw rug we have. It left these hard little grooves in the carpet and it ate up pieces... ( added 3 years 3 days ago.)

The Stages of Parenting You know you’re the parent of a baby when… · You get so little sleep your driver’s license photo looks better than you. · You’ve got stains on the shoulders of every shirt. · Whenever you reach into your pocket or reach for your purse, people... ( added 3 years 30 days ago.)

Barbie Tales - Run, Barbie, Run! When my toddler walks by with a naked Barbie doll, her hair drenched and dripping, I know Barbie has been skinny-dipping in the toilet. Call it a mother’s instinct. No matter what the circumstances are, moms have a way of putting two and two... ( added 3 years 72 days ago.)

Sleepless Mom in California My youngest daughter requires a feeding tube to eat. This is a recent development in her health and has left my husband and I sleep deprived as if we are caring for a newborn. Oh, how I have forgotten what fun it is to live without sleep! Whose... ( added 3 years 86 days ago.)

Mommisms - Moms Say The Darndest Things Mommisms are things your mother said a million times until one day they popped out of your mouth while you were ranting at your kids. For example: + If you fall and break your neck, I’ll kill you! + This is the worst looking pigsty I have... ( added 3 years 100 days ago.)

What Happens At Chuck E. Cheese Stays There The kids did a great job with their presentations for 4-H, so their Tio Fernando and Auntie Jenny took us out to celebrate. In my day, kid celebrations meant pizza and root beer down at the local Shakey’s. Nowadays they have Chuck E. Cheese.... ( added 3 years 107 days ago.)

Getting The Kids Ready For School In The Morning Is For The Birds I’m not a morning person and this morning proves it. At 6AM I’m up packing lunches, fumbling around in my state of near unconsciousness, hoping that it’s peanut butter I’m spreading on bread and not Crisco, and there is a cat hanging on the... ( added 3 years 155 days ago.)

Easter Surprises I can't believe that Easter is here already! How fast it has arrived! I'll tell you how fast. There's not an egg in the house and the kids are all expecting to paint eggs tomorrow. "Mom, this is an apple." "And it's a GOOD apple, let me tell you.... ( added 3 years 225 days ago.)

The Mom Corp – No Sissies Need Apply For some people a family of five is HUGE. I frequently hear, "You really have your hands full!" when I am out with just three of my kids. So it staggers the minds of some when I let them know I have two more at home. One grandmother told me it... ( added 3 years 247 days ago.)

Correcting Fashion Blunders Correcting Fashion Blunders ©Lisa Barker I realize that the younger generation is not interested in what I have to say about the clothing industry. But before anyone turns a deaf ear, I want to stand up for moms in my age group. Yes, we may... ( added 3 years 255 days ago.)

Thanksgiving In The Buff This year we’re going naked for Thanksgiving. I think my two-year old has the right idea. Lately he has taken to walking around with just his Nemo sandals on. That’s all he wants to wear. I hardly have the energy to make him wear a little shirt... ( added 3 years 352 days ago.)

The Wonder of Children The Wonder of Children ©Lisa Barker When you have toddlers ordinary things become tools for extraordinary purposes. Take crayons for example. When I was a toddler I enjoyed dropping them down the heating vents where they would melt and ooze... ( added 4 years 93 days ago.)

Just Because Your Kids Drive You Nuts, Doesn’t Mean You’re A Bad Parent Just Because Your Kids Drive You Nuts, Doesn’t Mean You’re A Bad Parent ©Lisa Barker Every little thing is setting me off today: the little eight-year old, the little four-year old and the little two-year old. Anybody want to rent a kid? ... ( added 4 years 100 days ago.)

Phone high jinks—or what goes around comes around Phone High Jinks - Or What Goes Around Comes Around ©Lisa Barker I finally got my kids back. You know how the minute you pick up the phone the kids are there? ( added 4 years 119 days ago.)

Deep Down, All Men Are Pyromaniacs Deep Down, All Men Are Pyromaniacs ©Lisa Barker My immigrant husband didn’t think when he first moved to the States that one of his most favorite American holidays would be the Fourth of July. But just like any red-blooded American, my husband... ( added 4 years 119 days ago.)