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 Articles by Lisa Barker (592)   
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92 Articles Total
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| Chatty Son is Music To My Ears Sometimes when a mom chooses to stay at home, she worries that her education will go to waste. Little by little caring for little ones kills off brains cells. We cut everything at the dinner table into tiny pieces. Were doomed to forever speak in... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Help, We Are All Being Held Hostage Youve got to be really, really ill to want to stay home in our family. My eldest daughter had a fever one night. Her head felt like it had swelled five times its size and her throat and ears ached. Still, she dragged herself by her teeth down the... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Lost & Found: One Mind Many times my husband will come home from work and ask me how my day went and I will tell him, I know I was busy all day, but I dont have any idea what I did!
Well, I finally figured it out. Im not losing my memory Im losing my mind.
Every... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
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| Cooking Up a Comedy of Errs On September 6, 2007 I, Lisa Barker, did not burn, cut or maim myself when I cooked dinner.
Dont laugh. This is a big feat. If there were chain mail I could wear while cooking dinner my husband would buy it for me. But he would have it... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Watch out! It's The Estrogen Express My husband is a manly man. He takes great pride in being the head of the household and he does a great job as a husband and father. I dont mind deferring to him...but hes about to be dethroned.
There are three women living in our house. Any... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Top Signs of Volunteer Burn-out One of the best things parents can do for their children is to volunteer in the classroom or for an after school sport or club. But sometimes parents, especially moms, can over-commit and that can quickly lead to burn-out and resentment. Post the... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Signs That You Are a Chocoholic 1. You like to dip strawberries, cherries and bananas in chocolate so you start experimenting at dinner with broccoli and cauliflower substituting chocolate for cheese.
2. You buy a bottle of chocolate syrup and carry it around in a small paper... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| I'm A Soul Woman I tried one of those self-tanning gimmicks. It took me almost an hour to choose from all the products and if I had just spent that amount of time in the sun, I wouldnt have had to spend twenty dollars on an experiment.
Everybodys going to know... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Parenting Teens: Next Will Come A Plague of Locusts It happens every day at 3:20PM. I brace myself behind the kitchen counter, the door opens and I defend myself with apples, peanut butter and pretzels.
They mow through them like linebackers then retreat to their rooms where they unburden... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Things That Make Children Deaf Any parent knows that the moment a child sees water there will be instantaneous deafness. It doesnt matter whether its an ocean, lake, river, stream or mud puddle. Even a Dixie cup full of water is a child magnet...because children cannot hear... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| It’s A Boy Thing If something is broken around here I know that one of the boys did it. I dont even have to ask. The girls would never do such a thing. If they break something, they tell me. If the boys break something I discover it piece by piece.
They also... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Of Pirates, Plunder and Great Accessories He had on his pirate cape, his pirate hat...and a pink purse slung over his right shoulder. He was ready for action.
Until the ants attacked.
Little girls keep tissue, lip gloss and hair barrettes in their purses. Little pirates keep... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| To Love, Honor and Suffer Being accused of snoring is one thing. Being accused of honking is completely ridiculous.
I dont honk in my sleep, I told my husband.
Yes, you do.
He told me to get some of those strips that you put across your nose to help reduce... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Back To School Derby Its that time of year again. I half expect to hear Target announce my arrival when I walk into the store with the kids in tow.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the 13th running of the Back-To-School Derby for the Barker Family. Mom is in good... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Fleeting Youth, Fleeting Sanity When the kids arent present sometimes judgment falters and we parents do things that maybe we shouldnt.
When I was ten years old I had a skateboard. My father found it in the garage and, perhaps feeling a bit younger than his thirty-five years... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Fat No, Chocolate Yes I decided to eat healthy. Two hours later I got the results back from a blood test declaring that I am a prime candidate for a heart attack. Is there a better sign that eating healthy is the right direction to go in?
So I cut the fat and... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Rules For Visiting With Little Ones I love visiting family, but Ive done a lot of thinking and I now know why my little ones are like mice on speed once we arrive at our destination.
When families travel the children sleep but the parents don't. We dont mean to let them sleep but... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Teens Train Mom, Leave Legacy For Younger Sibs My thirteen-year old daughters are leaving a legacy for the other kids. There are some unspoken rules that Ive come to respect.
1. When the door is closed to our room and you hear music, please knock.
2. When the door to our room is closed... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Laziness Takes Planning and Effort Deciphering what I scrawled on a Tupperware lid for a container I chucked in the freezer months ago is not one of my better skills. But I can always use it to my advantage.
The other night I defrosted what I thought was beef stew and came to... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| How To Determine The Future Vocation of Your Children Have you ever wondered what your children will grow up to be? Following is a list of possible vocations based on the behavior of children.
Child screams at top of lungs to get other children to play his way. Occupational aptitude: Drill... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| Another Day, Another Migraine I know its time to get up in the morning when I hear Miss I-havent-pooped-in-three-days-and-need-to-poop-right-now is hollering and Mr. Im-so-quiet-you-just-know-Im-into-something isnt making a peep.
As soon as I open my bedroom door, Mr.... ( added 199 days 22 hours ago.) |
| No Such Thing As Privacy For Mom The only way I can get a shower in this house is to get up at an ungodly hour, take my youngest into the bathroom with me or wait until my husband comes home.
Desperate, I took my son into the bathroom with me the other day. I suppose I had a... ( added 306 days 1 hour ago.) |
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| High School Reunion Finale I did a bit of sleuthing (some call it stalking) the night before the reunion and looked up as many photos of old classmates as I could find online. And I learned that twenty years REALLY ages people.
Not that anyone looked very old but I would... ( added 306 days 1 hour ago.) |
| High School Reunion Countdown By the time this column is printed I will have already gone to my twentieth reunion, I will have survived the paralysis that will set in mere moments before we pull up to the old high school.
For the umpteenth time I will discreetly hitch up my... ( added 306 days 1 hour ago.) |
| High School Reunion Blues, Part 2 Preparing to go to your high school reunion is like finding out you’re going to die and suddenly you realize you haven't done everything you SHOULD HAVE done.
In this case, how many of us are thinking - I should have gone to the gym more!
My... ( added 306 days 1 hour ago.) |
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