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Home » Writer's Blogs » Doug-Hart Find Happiness and Success in Life! Doug Hart (101) Doug Hart http://getpassionforlife.com Get the Habit of Good Decisions Posted Thursday, March 12, 2009 (257 days 3 hours ago.) Viewed 27 times. Hello, Are you pretty good at making decisions? How do you know if you are or aren't? Well, some people seem to make decisions pretty quickly, and others take forever. Which method is the best? In general I believe being decisive is a good thing, in other words being able to quickly weigh your options and decide what is the best choice. Look at it this way, if you are the type of person who can never seem to make up their mind, doesn't it make your decisions that much harder and painful? So what is the real deal, is it fear of making the wrong decision maybe? I believe in most cases, that's the case. What if you make the wrong decision and it causes problems? Well that's always possible, but not making a decision in the first place is normally worse than making a bad decision. Let me explain that, because I'm sure that doesn't sound logical. Say I put off making a choice of whether I should take a new job that a friend told me about recently. He says it would be different than what I'm doing now, although some of the same skills are involved and I do qualify in many ways for this job. Ok, I'm thinking I "kind of" like my current job, so what are the benefits of the new job that would tempt me? Well, in order to make an informed decision about anything you must weigh the benefits versus that drawbacks. Make a list, take into account your personal choices and how important different aspects of each item on the list really are. As an example of the job: 1. good thing - the pay is slightly higher 2. bad thing - it's in the city and I'm not crazy about that 3. good thing - the company is doing well, my current employer isn't 4. good thing - it's something different, shake up my life a little 5. bad thing - it's different, and I may not like doing it Ok, you see where I'm going with this right? These are all totally hypothetical reasons which I just made up, but very possibly things you may have to decide in the future. You also have to thing about the intangibles, such as what if you don't take this job and then get laid off from your current job? Are you by nature a risk-taker or do you look for the security first in any new position? If you value security and safety, perhaps staying at your current job is more prudent because at least it's a known factor. Not knowing what is going to happen is pretty scary for a lot of people and not worth the risk. I guess if you are going to lie awake at night worrying about the job situation, it might be a bad idea. Alright, that's just a hypothetical situation. But if you have a real problem making important decisions about your future, perhaps you need to evaluate why that is true. Some people just don't like to make decisions. If that's the case, I suggest you try to change that, since making decisions in life is a very critical skill that every adult needs to have. Are you really that afraid of making the wrong decision? What's the worst that could happen, you will have to change your mind and maybe lose a little time, money, etc. in the process. Back to reality, folks. We all have made bad decisions at one time or another! We just have to learn from them, that's all. Try to figure out why it was a bad decision, what brought you to that decision, and how you would change that next time. Did you weight all the options first? Did you go with your "gut" instinct, because usually that is the best way to go, although not always. Perhaps you have a friend that is knowledgeable about the situation you're in and asking him or her would be beneficial. Anyway, I have a decision to make here. Whether to ramble on for another 300 words, or just cut this blog short and be done with it. Ok, one more point - sometimes it's a great idea to take a chance, take advantage of an opportunity, and just go for it. If your decision is anything about that kind of situation, I say go for it. But that's just me... To your continued success and happiness! Permalink         Comments (0) Try Future Thinking For More Happiness! Posted Thursday, March 12, 2009 (257 days 3 hours ago.) Viewed 6 times. Hello friend, Today I want to discuss a topic that is a little bit esoteric not many people really know what I mean when I speak of "future-thinking", but I wanted to explain because it has helped me so much that I feel I must. I'm not talking about literally predicting the future, although if you work your plan well enough that's pretty much how it turns out. I really mean that you should not only plan for the future, but truly project yourself into the future, envisioning what your life will look like after you reach all of your major goals. In order to do that you must first have a list of goals, which I assume you already do. (If not, please make that list pronto, it's one of the most important things you'll ever do to achieve success at all). Look at your list and then think about what it means to you what are doing five, ten, twenty years from now? Where will you live, in a nice 5-bedroom home in a nearby gated community? Or maybe in that mansion by the edge of town where the millionaires live? Who will be with you, the woman/man of your dreams? Your family, if you have one already? How happy will you all be? What kind of routine will you have, working from the house for a few hours a day, or maybe in a high rise office building that accommodates the most prestigious firms in the state? All of these details must be made clear in your mind, in order to make "future-thinking" work for you. Not only must you think of these things in great detail, you must emotionalize them, get excited about them, every day or even several times a day if possible. These are you dreams! Make them come alive, make them as real as possible for you. Use your imagination to believe that these things are happening now in your world. Then once you are clear on your goals in detail, the next step is to put your detailed plan into action. This is one step many seem to forget about, the action and how important it is. You can have the most creative, detailed, well-thought out plan ever devised but if you don't take action it is useless! So take that plan, and think about every little thing that you must do to make it work, every day. Even with my current plan I usually sit down several nights a week and review everything in my plan, and decide what is working and what isn't. Am I on track to reach my goals? Some and not others, possibly? What do I need to do tomorrow, next week, next month to reach these goals. That is what you ought to be asking yourself every day. Make sure the actions you are taking are working, at least getting you in the right direction of your goals. If they aren't, then make the necessary changes now, and take the next step. See if those changes work. If not, make some more alterations in your actions, then reassess again to make sure you are making progress. I'm sure you have heard the expression "the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step". That is how you must think, to take that long journey. Just remember the goals that are in your future, if you can still keep those dreams alive every day they will feed your hunger for success and keep you motivated to continue. Think how fantastic your future will be! If you don't get excited about that, you need to do some serious thinking about what your dreams mean to you, because they aren't getting you very far. I know you can do better! We all can, if we just look into the future and see how great it can be. To your continued success and happiness! Permalink         Comments (0) Powerful Beliefs Mean More Happiness Posted Thursday, March 12, 2009 (257 days 3 hours ago.) Viewed 7 times. Hello again, When I mention beliefs, most people immediately relate this in some way to religion. That's not the belief that I'm referring to, although that is one type of belief of course. I'm talking about what you believe to be true for yourself and your future. What you believe, deep down, about yourself internally. Our beliefs about who we are can be created by many things, mostly by our environment and how we were brought up. In addition, our experiences in life have a great impact on our beliefs. What were you taught when you were young about the possibilities for your future, what occupation you should pursue, how much income you would have? If you're like most people, including myself, not much was ever said so you just looked around you and made your own assumptions. If you grew up in a small town where nearly everyone worked in a coal mine, then your future looked pretty dark, literally. However if you grew up in a well-to-do area where nearly everyone was college educated and had either a solid profession or a business, then you probably saw many more possibilities for yourself. Regardless, other factors have a great impact on your beliefs. One of the most important things that effect our beliefs is the way we talk to ourselves internally. When you are presented with a task, either at school or at your job, if you tell yourself there's no way I'm going to get this done, then chances are you won't! When I say "tell yourself", that's exactly what we do, by a method known as internal dialog. We don't of course consciously tell ourselves, but on an almost subconscious level we have mini-conversations with ourselves every minute of every day! They are constant and never ending, and cause us to make decisions that are vital to our lives. Wouldn't it be better if we had more control over these decisions, these thoughts that are constantly bouncing around in our heads? In order to change our actions, we must learn (through habit) to control this dialog as much as possible in order to control our actions. Internal dialog is such a major force in our lives that we must learn to change, and use it to our benefit instead of our detriment. Of course, it may be impossible to control completely, because external forces are always causing us to lose our focus in so many ways. But believe me the sooner you learn to believe in what you can do in a positive way, and block out all of the negative self-talk that floods most peoples minds, the sooner you will be on your way to reaching your goals. At the end of this book I have some exercises that will help, make sure to check those out! Most people have other beliefs that need to be changed as well, ones that cripple us every day without our even knowing it. Limiting beliefs about not only what we can or can't do, but also what we deserve in life. Many people unfortunately have a negative self-image that limits them in life, almost like a "governor" on a large engine that only allows 50% of the power to be used! This negative image is a constant nagging reminder that says "I'm not good enough" or "I could never make a million dollars". Don't believe it for one minute! The only difference between the mindset of someone that makes a million dollars and one that makes $20K a year as a sales clerk is BELIEF in what they can do. You must begin right now to tell yourself every day that you are indeed capable of becoming whatever you wish to become, whether it's a millionaire, successful at your chosen career, an actor/actress, a writer, or whatever your goals are. Remember, if anyone can do it, you can repeat that persons success by first believing that you can do it, then following their example and modeling their behavior. There are many ways to model another persons behavior, you can find a mentor and copy their strategies for success at whatever skill you need to learn. Even learning from a book about this person, if you can't find a mentor that can teach you directly, will suffice. The key is to learn how others perform and duplicate their process, whether you are learning to ski, trade stocks on Wall Street, or run a business successfully. The principles need to be learned from someone who is already successful, and copying someone that's already doing what you want to be skilled at will help speed this process. Another very important aspect of belief is a little thing called "self-esteem", something many people are woefully short on. The problem with building self-esteem is that our belief in what we can accomplish in life is so embedded in our minds by the time we are adults, it takes a very strong process to repair if it is damaged. You see a lot of our beliefs are formed when we are quite young, by accident or by someone simply telling us we are "stupid" or we'll "never amount to anything", or similar words that sink into our subconscious and take hold without our knowing it. In order to change our thoughts internally and thus our beliefs, we must change that thought process. How do we do it? By talking to our subconscious mind, repeating phrases that help to strengthen our self-esteem once again. This may sound strange to some people but try this anyway; it works and has worked for thousands of people. Write several phrases down on paper, things that you want to believe in that will improve your self-esteem, and repeat them to yourself at least twice a day in the morning and before going to bed at night. Things such as "I can accomplish anything in life I desire", or "my success is up to me, and I chose to be successful". From now on make sure that you have a strong conviction that anything you want in life can be accomplished, because your belief will make it so. If at first you aren't sure you really believe it with all your heart, continue to "act" as if you do anyway. In time, your beliefs will be in step with the new you. Remember that beliefs held for a long time may change slowly, but with a powerful desire and passion to change them you are destined for success and happiness. This I assure you... Permalink         Comments (0)

Archives: November 2009 M T W T F S S 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30           « Oct     Previous Posts: Get the Habit of Good Decisions Try Future Thinking For More Happiness! Powerful Beliefs Mean More Happiness Get Amnesia and Find More Happiness In Life? Better Health, More Happiness! Do You Have the Key To Long-Term Happiness? Ten Ways To Re-Motivate Yourself Overcome Inertia For Your Success All Posts by Doug Hart Related Posts: Changing oneself 5 Helpful Tips to Live in Accord with Your Other Half Creative Thinking Using Meditation How Our Priorities Change with Age Consciously Choose Your Social System How To Experience More Abundance Naturally. Learn How to Celebrate Your Limitations for Life Success Intuitive Insights and Meanings

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