How do you deal with a boss who is threatened by you?
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Whether it's in a boss-employee situation or another relationship in life; I would try by my attitude, actions and words, to convince the other person that I can and do understand and know what they are feeling and why.
Hi Ella. Thanks for your input, your insights are always precious.
Offer to take him/her out for some drinks and say,"It's my treat!"
That'll do it!
Over drinks you shall bond better and all the pretenses of 'threatening' will drop away..
LOL Paul, that might work if I drank something other than water, juice, and soda :-)
I'm guessing your boss is a woman? It's been my experience many women, whether they're in a position of power or not, feel threatened by other women. You're not the problem, they are. You don't make them feel threatened, it's their own insecurites, so there's nothing you can do about that. We can control how others affect us, and how we feel, but we can't control how others feel. Sorry, I wish I had a good answer for you. It's so much easier working with men. They say it like it is and there's no game play. Your situation sounds very stressful and I feel for you. I've been there and it's not worth it.
Well, "quit" will be the word for me. I will think I do not want to be working under someone who I feel insecure and no fun because no one can change another especially the boss is a woman.
Oh wow, Teresa, we seem to be on the same page today. I just finished an article about a "boss" I had that made my working life miserable. I mean just minutes ago. I'll be submitting it on Monday. But I don't think it will really help you all that much. :(
As far as I know, there is no way you can make your boss feel unthreatened. You have no control over anyone's feelings but your own. People are going to think and feel whatever the heck they want regardless of what you might say or do.
In my mind, all you can really do is protect your psyche. Don't let the insecure persons problems become your own. Don't figure you can fix it because you probably can't. Just be true to yourself. Do your job and step back from it. One of my favorite sayings from the Tao Te Ching is number nine: (this is only one translation)
Fill your bowl to the brim and it will spill.
Keep sharpening your knife and it will blunt.
chase after money and security and your heart will never unclench.
Care about people's approval and you will be their prisoner.
Do your work, then step back.
The only path to serenity.
I have found applications for that in so many different areas that I could never list them. I'll be sending well wishes and positive energy in your direction regarding this. You may call them prayers if you like. :) Love you and good luck!
Pray for him and try to reinforce the fact that you are on the same team.
This one is tough for me. I've sort of told this one before - I worked at a fabulous job in investments for The Travelers. I was one small step away from being Director. My immediate boss had championed me all along my fast-moving career, giving me more and more responsibilities. I managed a staff and had a very visible position in The Travelers - until the cuts started coming. And she was in a position of knowledge. It was her or me. Guess who got it? Oh yes, about the threatened part - I started getting too much visibility. I excelled at my tasks and my staff was trained to the t's. I had been awarded "Outstanding Employee" three years in a row. I was pictured (after auditioning with several other outstanding employees) in the annual report. My salary was excellent and moving. My life insurance made me richer dead than alive. I was acknowledged for my "Brown Bag Series." You bet she was threatened. She made more money than I did and she was in the one step higher echelon of decision making. The math was easy and, in hindsight, I really should have seen it coming. She was a turncoat that needed to cut or be cut. I never even got the chance to deal with that boss. I was eliminated so she could survive.
Total Answers: 8, Total Page Views: 3,972.throw his next meetings agenda in the shredder garbage ....I'm just kidding ....what?!
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