Do you tell a friend if you know their partner is cheating?
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I think I will because I hate to see my friend being cheated but I have to tell her at the right time and the right place. Most important is for me to carry an extra box of tissue, just in case she might cry a river.
Amen to the tissue box, Hilda. I wonder if there is ever a right time and place?
Never, not ever; it's absolutely none of your business and you will be forever resented as the messenger who introduced news of disaster rather than one who had good intentions.
Never forget,"The road to Hell, is paved with good intentions".
Paul
I'm so torn about this, but I do hear you, Paul, about it not being any of my business. Only thing is, if it was me (if I had a partner who was cheating), and I didn't find out for ages but my friend knew all that time I'm sure I'd feel betrayed by them when I finally found out...
As I don't recognize partner example as a authenticate example I answer its Local case that is about wife and Husband.
In Islamic Law if one witness this issue he shouldn't inform anyone. if I claim I witnessed such action I must pay sever penalties. but if this happens openly and in front of 4 other men witnesses it is a different story.
That's interesting. I don't quite understand what you mean by "authenticate example"...
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It would depend on how close you are as friends. Some friends, no matter what the relationship is like, won't really like you messing with their other relationships. Then too, it would depend on how much the cheating is affecting you ... if you care deeply for your friend then the knowledge, if bottled up, could do you some serious emotional harm.
It's a very tricky situation. There are so many factors to weigh. But I tend to be a meddler and I would most likely say something or other about it. Maybe not come right out and say that your partner is cheating on you (you'd have to be really, really sure about something like that and appearances can often be deceiving), but maybe I might mention something about the partner being gone a lot or working a lot of late nights, etc. Just something to get the friend to examine it themselves. I'm such a coward. :) Luckily, I've only ever once known this sort of thing and at the time I was closer to the wife who was cheating on her husband than to the husband so I didn't feel compelled to say anything. Whew!
Whew indeed! I actually don't know what I'd do. I also don't think I could keep quiet, not if it was a really close friendship, because that would mean a lie would be between us all the time. Tough call, though. I hope I never have to be in that position...
Total Answers: 5, Total Page Views: 318.This is such an interesting question. What is the definition of cheating?
My husband came home the other day and said something to the effect "but his wife doesn't know, so don't tell her". He wasn't talking about someone having an extramarital affair, but I'm sure it wouldn't take a whole lot for it to escalate to that point.
Ever since he told me I've been wondering WHY he told me. He knows my first reaction would be to run and blab to the person, but since he asked me not to, I wouldn't, but he also knows that my memory is like a sieve - it would be very easy for me to forget I'm not supposed to say anything and mention something or another in passing.
In either instance, the person would know.
The other possibility is I could avoid seeing this person for the rest of my life, but that seems a bit excessive.
So I really don't know what I would/should do. If the situation was reversed I would WANT to know, but not everyone thinks the same way. In this particular instance I think it might totally devastate this woman to know what she is not being told, but can anyone ever know how someone else will react to certain news?
My answer is I don't know :)
Pat Johnson
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