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You have reached the age where you can start thinking seriously on your wedding day. You would like a steady partner, whom which you could spend the rest of your life with.
You have dates some and been involved in a couple of serious relationships, but now you feel ready for the "real thing".
So how do you do it? How do you find the right one?
First of all, you need to be clear with yourself on what kind of person you are after. Try to imagine him/her and the qualities he/she should have. It should involve character as well as beauty.
This "shopping list" should include 5-10 points. Don’t try to make a list with more then that or you will never find your partner as they might not excites or might be very few of them to reach.
For example: Your changes finding a smart, attractive, tall, funny partner are higher then finding a smart, attractive, tall, warm, financially stable, non smoking, blue eyes, loves Italian food partner. You got the point, right?
As you do then, try to include THE most important characters - Thos that you could not compromise about. You might compromise about the "non smoking" and maybe the "warm" but not about the financially stable and the attractive, for example.
Another thing you need to take in consideration is reality. Try to look at it with an objective approach - What are my changes meeting this person and would this person would like to be with me? For example - if you are the short, shy chubby type and you dream about the tall, party animal type it might just be that they will not be interested in your characters.
While you are using the objective approach, DO NOT fall into the "who will want me as I am" trap. Even thought, you are the "homey", quiet, shy type there are many of them out there just like you that would love to be with you.
The next trap that you need to be aware of - Try not to go out there and find that partner with all those characters that we would like them to have thinking that "you will get them "from him/her!
Why is that, you ask? This is because no one can solve your problems but you. Actually, the situation can become so bad, as you start arguing on different thing because your partner would like to change you to be just as he/she is. That will cause you to be more and deeper inside yourselves and not the great person you are.
Opposite side will complete each other and different types will attract each others? I believe in that, but it is all a question of proportions.
If the differences are small, that might help the two parts to complete each other BUT if they differences are too big, it will resolve in a relationship, where you are quite and aren’t saying a word will your partner in about "to explode" out of energy. That gap will be bigger and bigger until you would have to stop it all.
Now, after you have a "check list" ready, it is time for ACTION.
You can not sit at home and wait for prince/princess charming to just fall from the sky for you.
Go out, meet new people, join different social groups, go to parties or try to do it the modern way - Online dating…it worked for me, and I am married to the one I always looked for.
Good luck.
Yair Czitrom
www.jaters.com - Jewish singles dating service
Yair Czitrom is the owner and webmaster of jaters.com - An experienced online dater that took his dating knowledge and web skills as a dater and as an IT pro to help other daters/singles in today’s cyber world. He is an expert writer on ezinearticles.com and searchwarp.com |
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