This Sunday is Father's Day
and, for the first time in my life, I don't have a dad. We take a lot of
things for granted in our lives, including our own health and the health of our
parents but last September I lost my dad and best friend. Okay, Pop was
85 and had a failed quad-bypass, and I'm in my fifties... but he's gone
and it hurts.
Dad was from German and
Scottish stock, which meant that he was a grouchy tight-wad. He grew up in the
depression, went through WWII and settled down to raise a family of 3
boys. He was never touchy-feely but always there to support us, build
strength, work ethics and morals in his sons.
Life gives us interesting
turns and lessons and the circle of life is a strange one. My daughter
and son-in-law were trying to adopt and were on a long list for a baby from South Korea.
They were granted their baby boy when he was just two days old but waited
5 months for the papers to be certified between two countries.
Dad's operation did not go well
and in a short time he was on a feeding tube and slowly dying. His wish to me
was to pull the tube and let him go...and I signed the papers. At first I felt that I was signing his death
warrant, but my wife, in her wisdom, assured me that I was actually signing his
release form.
The estimate was that it would be 5 to 10 days before he would die.
The morning that I signed
the papers, my daughter called to say that they had gotten "the Call"
and that they had to leave the next day for Seoul to get their baby boy.
I told Dad what they were
doing and that he was now officially a Great-Grandfather. He smiled and said
"Well that's wonderful." Those were dad's last words, he died
an hour later. It was as if Dad could then leave, knowing that the circle was complete.
So this is a bitter-sweet
Father's Day for me because I still have a father in my family, but instead of
my Pop, it's my son-in law Michael and now I'm a grandfather to little Zachary
Kim Ruggiero.
Thanks for allowing me to
indulge myself in missing my dad. Fatherhood in the world today is often
overlooked and undervalued and that's a hideous mistake.
Thanks to all of the dads
out there, ours is the greatest responsibility and reward possible. If you're
not a dad, then thank yours for me!
HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!
Steve Baker is a business advisor and
the author of the award winning book, PUSHING WATER UPHILL With A Rake;
Memoirs of a Successful Failure. He lives in Colorado where he is an avid poor golfer. He
can be reached through his website http://www.PushingWater.com
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