Domestic violence has always been a taboo topic. Whenever we hear our coupled neighbors or
friends fighting, our first instinct is to say, “Not my business.” Right?
Well, whose business is it then?
The Abused – “I'm ashamed and afraid”… “What will people
think?” “I am a failure if I admit that
he/she is doing this to me”… “But I love
him/her”… “It’s just when they are
stressed/have been drinking, etc.”
… Whatever the excuse, “I cannot
let anyone know”… “I will lie, hide,
seclude myself, and abandon my friends and family to keep our secret.”
The Abuser – obviously
all of the above make this very easy for the abuser. They prey on your secrecy, shame, and
insecurities.
So, what should you do at the first sign of abuse? Tell everyone… go against all of your basic
instincts to withdraw, cover up, and make excuses. Tell your mother, your father, your best
friend, you aunts and uncles, your cousins, the abuser’s family and friends…
make sure they KNOW that you will not be silent… they will not get away with
it…
Next, GET OUT! Get
away.
The Statistics
- Every 24 hours, more than three women on average, will have
been murdered by their domestic partners in the United
States.
- In 2000, 1,247 women and 440 men were killed by an intimate
partner.
- In 2000, 33.5% of women murdered were by an intimate partner.
- Women who are pregnant or have recently given birth are more
likely to be victims of homicide than to die of ANY other cause.
- Homicide is the leading cause of death for pregnant women,
followed by cancer, respiratory conditions, motor vehicle collisions, and drug
overdose, peripartum and postpartum cardiomyopthy, and suicide.
What about the Children?
- Studies suggest that 3.3 - 10 million children witness some
form of domestic violence annually.
- A national survey of more than 6,000 American families shows
that 50% of the men, who frequently assaulted their wives, also frequently
abused their children.
Think Teenager are
Exempt?
- Forty percent of girls age 14 to 17 reported knowing someone their age who
had been hit or beaten by a boyfriend.
Find Help:
The National Domestic
Violence Hotline:
1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
Operated by the Texas
Council on Family Violence
National Coalition Against
Domestic Violence (NCADV)
http://www.ncadv.org/
Violence Against Women Act
In 1994, with Hillary
Clinton’s strong support, Congress passed the landmark Violence Against Women
Act (VAWA) as part of the Administration’s crime bill. The Act established new Federal criminal
provisions and key grant programs to direct critical services to victims and to
improve the criminal justice system’s response to domestic violence, sexual
assault, and stalking. These grants have
supported the work of prosecutors, law enforcement officials, the courts,
victim advocates, health care and social service professionals, and
intervention and prevention programs.
The VAWA was unanimously reauthorized by Congress in October 2005. http://clinton.senate.gov/news/statements/details.cfm?id=246937&&
For detailed
information on the Violence Against Women Act, including privacy laws, visit http://www.epic.org/privacy/dv/vawa.html.
The most important
thing to remember, though, if it is your friend or family member, do not turn a
blind eye. How will you feel if your
friend turns out to be one of the three who die today?
Offer support,
advice, a way out, an ear just to listen… but whatever you do, be there for
them no matter how hard they try to push you away or how vehemently they deny
it.
I never really paid attention to this song until the other
day when I really listened to the words for the first time…
Artist: The Red
Jumpsuit Apparatus.
Song: Face Down.
Hey, girl you know you drive me crazy
one look puts the rhythm in my hand.
Still I'll never understand why you hang around
I see what's going down.
Cover up with make up in the mirror
tell yourself it's never gonna happen again
you cry alone and then he swears he loves you.
Do you feel like a man
when you push her around?
Do you feel better now, as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.
A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect
every action in this world bear a consequence
If you wait around forever you will surely drown
I see what's going down.
I see the way you go and say you're right again,
say you're right again,
heed my lecture.
Do you feel like a man
when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.
Face down in the dirt she said, this doesn't hurt she said I finally had
enough.
Face down in the dirt she said, this doesn't hurt she said I finally had
enough.
One day she will tell you that she has had enough. It’s coming round again.
Do you feel like a man, when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.
Do you feel like a man, when you push her around?
Do you feel better now as she falls to the ground?
Well I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end
as your lies crumble down, a new life she has found.
Face down in the dirt she said, this doesn't hurt she said I finally had
enough. |
