Many years ago, when Oscar Wilde was dining in a luxurious London restaurant, he shocked his companions when he picked up a lamb chop with his fingers and began eating it. Realizing that people were looking at him disapprovingly, Wilde returned their glances and remarked, “You poor souls, have you completely forgotten that eating is supposed to be fun?"
Many of us take food and the dining experience for granted. We never stop to really think that one should be able to enjoy the process of eating with as many of the senses as possible—taste, smell, sight, touch. We gobble down our food or gingerly peck at it in a disconnected or disinterested way with no desire to experiment, no curiosity about the senses, and no willingness to make mistakes. Exploration of the senses is particularly made so difficult when you are trying to juggle the slippery elements of what, when, and how much to eat and at the back of your mind hearing that familiar voice from your childhood—“do not get your fingers dirty," or “don’t eat too much."
The way you eat not only influences how food tastes but how you handle the phenomenon of total sensory appeal. All cultures share the old adage, “The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach." Some African cultures take it a step further by adding, “The way a man (person) eats at the table is the way he (she) eats on the bed."
How people eat can give you a mental picture of how they express themselves in other sensuous areas of their lives. Let’s just say if he or she is mindlessly shoveling mouthfuls of food into his or her mouth, or is a fussy eater, he or she will generally be mechanical or finicky in other areas as well -- if you know what I mean.
You can learn a lot about people when you watch them eat and you can also completely blow a man or woman’s mind and turn him or her so ON watching the way you eat.
The powerful secret of the seductiveness of the eating experience that I am about to briefly summarize here may be a little hard for some people in “civilized society" to wrap their minds around. So I am asking you for a moment not to jump into being so judgemental and get in touch with the “wild" nature inside of you. Forget what the image consultants say about the right dinning etiquette and instead of thinking “corporate image" think “pure seduction".
Since everyone must eat, what we eat and how we eat is a manner of expression that has taken years to cultivate, and in most cases, is completely instinctive. Right?
Not quite. Men and women who’ve taken time to really learn the subtle but very powerful art of seducing the opposite sex know how to use even this seemingly very instinctive every day activity into an experience that gets the opposite sex all warm and fuzzy in the right places.
A man or woman who has taken time to really learn the subtle but very powerful art of seducing the opposite sex knows how to draw attention to his or her sensuousness in a very seductive way and often very sexually arousing. He or she deliberately and seductively trails the fingers around a plate of food, lifts a glass of wine and smells it with the eyes closed, pauses in the middle of a sentence to taste a sauce, savours the saltiness of each potato chip, listens to the loud crunch of each bite, digs the teeth into the fruit as if for the first time, and will even emit a low “moan" when eating something that moves him or her to express exquisite sensuousness. There is no shame or timidity in his or her actions—all this is perfectly effortless.
With fingers busy, mouths, lips, tongues, noses, and eyes enticed, sensuousness lingers in their every bite— this is close to the “wild" as possible.
When it comes to using the eating experience to seduce a man or woman, don’t rush anything. Let me say that again, PLEASE, DO NOT RUSH A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G! Take time to tease, coax and play with every single sense -- his/hers and yours. Freeing up your capacity for sensuousness lifts you above the mundane.
Start with the visual appeal of the food; notice the various colours of the foods and the variety of textures and shapes and what each contributes to the food.
Next, take a deep breath and smell the food. Close your eyes and take a moment to savour the smell of the individual flavours. Open your eyes and look carefully at each item. Examine it fully, noting whatever it is that appeals to you about its appearance. Allow all your thoughts or feelings about the food to register. Bring the food close to your mouth and prepare to take a bite. The instant your fingers touch the food, broaden your awareness to include your sense of touch. Pay attention to the physical sensation of the food against your hand—texture, firmness, temperature, and so on. You may also detect a shift in temperature around your lips as you bring the food close to your mouth. Keep in mind that, with sufficient desire, anything you are about to put in your mouth at any time can be made into an erotic experience. Pull gently at your food, peel with fingers, suck out the centers, play it upon your lips, lick up the juices, feel the tongue literally tingle while the food lingers long enough to be swept away by the tongue. Chew thoroughly to release all the different tastes in the food so you can fully experience the taste while allowing yourself time to enjoy the feeling of the food’s texture.
Never lose eye contact with your dining partner. Whenever your mind wanders off your plate and away from your partner, notice where it’s gone and gently bring it back to your dining partner.
Remember though, that eating with your fingers isn’t a license to poor eating manners. Always have clean hands and eat with your fingers without getting them all messy. A savvy diner delicately uses only three fingers to eat, except for some foods that might require all the five fingers and the palm.
Depending on how far along mutual attraction has gone, placing food directly into his or her mouth with your fingers can stir up bigger and better things. Make sure that you are not just putting food in his/her mouth but making it an experience of sight, taste, smell, sight and touch
This is the easy part. The hard part is that there are not many foods in “polite" society that you can dig in exuberantly with your fingers, which is why you should probably cook the meal together. For culinary seduction to work, you must first figure out what kind of man or woman you are planning to seduce and then create a menu sure to woo based on his or her interests and personality. People love it when their dates take an interest in their interests. Focused and knowledgeable effort is sexy (in my e-Book, I give a few tips on the menu that hits the ground running).
A jointly-prepared meal, especially accompanied with good conversation, can boost the odds that sparks will start flying. Be spontaneous and do unexpected things. Feed each other while you cook. Whisper suggestive comments, paint each other with melted butter (not when it’s hot), fling bits of food pieces and let them fall strategically on the body, etc. In the best of all possible worlds, you can peak your date’s imagination with a lasting impact.
Your body is bristling with sensory receptors—God’s gift to humankind—it’s up to you to responsibly enjoy it. Give yourself the permission to really celebrate what you have inside; celebrate it with yourself and with each other.
One last piece of advice, if your mojo isn’t working during these multi-sensuous, full interaction gourmet moments—or if you missed the “sexual innuendo" (all the pulling gently, peeling with fingers, sucking out the centers, playing it upon your lips, licking up the juices, feeling the tongue literally tingle) then maybe you seriously need a good coach-- :-)
Wow! It's getting hot in here!
About the Author: Christine Akiteng is an internationally renowned Sexual Confidence/Dating Coach and author of e-Books: The Art Of Seducing Out Of Fullness, Breaking A Bad Relationships Pattern, and Playing Hard-To-Get The Love Way.
» left by Creative Blogger(7,370) Creative Blogger (299 days 8 hours ago.)
Oh dear Christine, you know your tips on how to eat is exactly how I do eat! Even a single chocolate lasts 5-6 nibbles. I just enjoy food, what can I say ;) Respond to this comment
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