Forgetfulness does not always mean Alzheimer’s. Dementia is a group of symptoms that are caused by changes in brain function. Dementia is caused by many conditions. The group of symptoms of dementia can be caused by dehydration, vitamin deficiency, or bad reaction to medication just to name a few. Sometimes emotional problems such as loss of a loved one or feelings of sadness and loneliness which lead to depression can cause feeling of confusion or forgetfulness. Sometimes the cause of memory loss is in fact Alzheimer’s or multi infarct dementia but not always, you must get a diagnosis from a doctor to be sure.
I have had the privilege of working with many people who were suffering from memory loss. Some had a professional diagnosis from their doctor of Alzheimer’s others had one or more of the problems listed above. The cause of their memory loss was not my top priority at the time nor is it now. My priority is always compassionate caregiving. I’m going to share some very important insight with you about how our elderly population has been frightened into becoming obsessed with the fear of memory loss and why.
“The scary thing about memory loss is not so much that I have memory loss but what is going to happen to me because of it." Memory loss is very frightening regardless of its cause. Caregivers for the memory impaired have the ability to cause fear or bring comfort. Be informed, be compassionate, and always give unconditional care and love.
The Most Common Fears:
- Will I be able to care for myself?
- Who will care for me? Will they be kind and patient?
- Are people going to treat me different?
- Will my family still respect me? Will they be able to still love me?
- Will people think I’m crazy and make fun of me?
- What will happen to me, and all of the thing I worked for all my life?
- Will I be institutionalized or will I be care for at home?
- What if I run out of money? Will I die alone?
Compassionate Caregiving
From the time we are born till the time we die. We all strive for acceptance. We dedicate our whole lives to the pursuit of being acceptable. We all have different definitions of what makes us acceptable or unacceptable. This is where the fear factor comes into play. With memory loss not only is the person not living up to others expectations but they have failed in their own expectations for themselves. They also become vulnerable to everyone else in their lives. Now that there is memory loss they have to depend on another person, and in some cases that means total dependence on another person. They are now faced with a trust issue, a very deep trust issue. It’s one thing to trust someone when you are aware of everything in your life, but now they are forced to have total and complete blind trust with no control coming from within their own awareness. We all have the desire to feel like we have some control of our own destiny. The best gift you can give the person you are caring for is the gift of honesty and respect. Help them to understand what is happing to them and why. What the causes are and what they can do if anything. Include them in the plan for the future and for their care. Don’t be afraid to ask for help!
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