I recently stumbled across an article from “Redbook" magazine about secrets guys keep from their wives and it really surprised me. Not so much that husbands keep secrets, but more so what those secrets were.
The first was something that I really didn’t consider to be a secret. It was that guys admit to falling in lust with other women at least ten times a day. Added to that was the simple confession that it in no way meant that they wanted to leave their wife. The men in the article claim that they don’t want to look at that other woman walking past, it is just their eyes are like a radar. They even go on to say that if a husband says he doesn’t look at other women, he more than likely just has really good peripheral vision.
This was no surprise to me. We see this every day in every good drama. As a wife, I actually find it funny to watch my husband now struggle not to look to keep from causing arguments. I wish I could say I was one of those wives that don’t feel threatened, but my self-confidence isn’t like those women walking around with the low-cut tops on in the first place. I do get a chuckle watching him try to keep looking at my face when an attractive woman does walk by. Bless his heart.
The second doesn’t really apply to me, but it can be relatable. The study found that more than 75 percent of men who go play golf, really are playing golf for the sole reason of getting away from the wife, kids and home responsibilities. Most of them are horrible at golf, but just want time away. As if we did not know this as well. Honestly women, do we really think it takes them that long in the bathroom. He needs space just as much as we need space.
I actually like the third secret because it does explain a lot about the fear of growing old my husband has had in the past. It is that husbands really are not excited about commitment. I know some of you newly married women might say, “My man has no problem with commitment." Honestly, it is something that every man has to get used to because of how our society is. The article puts it best, “This is a dicey one, so first things first: We love you to death. We think you're fantastic. Most of the time we're absolutely thrilled that we've made a lifelong vow of fidelity to you in front of our families, our friends and an expensive videographer," Redbook states. “But most of us didn't spend our formative years thinking, ‘Gosh, I just can't wait to settle down with a nice girl so we can grow old together.’ Instead we were obsessed with how many women who resembled Britney Spears we could have sex with before we turned 30. Generally it takes us a few years (or decades) to fully perish that thought."
Another secret men try to hide is that making money or being the breadwinner is important to them. This has really hit home lately in my household as we have discussed me going back to work full-time. I have watched just the talking of it destroy my husband’s ego. He wants to be able to provide security and it makes him feel more like a man if he is the one making the money. I think it is sad that as a society we make men feel like they have to keep this emotion a secret. I understand equality women, but do we really have to make a man feel bad for wanting to be the one to provide for us and our family.
Probably my favorite in this article is that men actually do fear their wife driving. This is something that has always made me laugh. I can’t stand my husband driving! I guess the difference is that I have no problem voicing that emotion. It made me laugh to know that he could feel the same way. Guess what, he does! Explains so much about how he acts in the passenger seat. I always fear troubles at work when he sits over there. Who would of thought it was my driving the whole time.
Well, the article is full of other secrets some sweet and some more surprises. From finding out that my husband loves me more each year to that men like being mothered, it was an elightening article. I encourage all women to check it out and then talk with your husband about what he agrees with. It is really interesting. To read the entire article, you can visit online at Webmd: http://men.webmd.com/features/11-dont-tell-the-wife-secrets-all-men-keep
But with the article, it got me to thinking and I thought I would issue a challenge to the married women out there. Do we as wives keep secrets? I was trying to think of any secrets I keep and I think women are more open then men. But I thought I would get us started anyway. The only secret I try to keep from my husband (which has become impossible with the birth of kids and the fact we will be married nine years this week) involves bodily functions. I would be happy if my husband never knew I went to the bathroom. Of course, with kids throwing the door open while I am in process, that fantasy has quickly gone away.
So lets hear it: what secrets do you keep from your husband? Do you sneak a Starbucks? I would love to learn some more. Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments!
