So many parents complain that their children don't listen to them. They can talk until they are "blue in the face" and yet the child still does the same behavior that the parent is trying to change.
Children actually listen and hear more than we give them credit for. How many times has your child asked specific questions about a phone conversation you just finished? Although they look like they are plugged into their game and distracted, very often they are listening to the adult conversations around them.
If this is true, then parents need to be more careful about the language and attitudes they convey to their children when they think the kids are not listening. Young children especially are very impressionable and eager to believe what parents tell them or to mimic how their own parents act.
One of the common subjects that parents have definite opinions about is school. Some parents like their child's teacher, others will despise the teacher. Some parents agree with the school's philosophy and rules while other parents will rebel. No matter what category you fall into, chances are your child is watching you and adapting YOUR opinions and actions about school as their own.
When parents have a positive attitude about school, their children understand that going to school is their job, getting good grades is important for their future and that the teacher deserves respect. These same children will also be more willing to complete their homework and they understand that there will be consequences for misbehaving.
If parents have a negative attitude about the school and/or teacher, very often their children will show the opposite behavior: misbehaving in class, disrespecting the teacher or other classmates, or not turning in assignments or projects. Sometimes these children can be punished or reprimanded for bad behavior and they won't care.
Sometimes a parent's one-sided conversation can be misunderstood by the child. If you tell a friend on the telephone that little Suzy is failing math and that's all she hears, she may not understand how to work harder to raise her grade. All she hears is that she's failing, which can often lower her self-esteem and diminish her excitement about going to school.
Obviously, these are some generalizations and not every parent or child will fall into these two categories. There could also be other reasons for why a child's grades start to fall. But looking at your own beliefs and comments about the school is a good place to start and having a conversation with your child about the importance of doing well in school can benefit the whole family.
About the Author: Christina Lemmey is the owner of http://www.WonderYearsRadio.com, a weekly podcast dealing specifically with elementary school topics. If your child is struggling in school, enroll in our free 7-Day ecourse about Discovering Your Child's Learning Style. Making simple changes during homework time could be the difference between passing and failing grades. |
