You say to yourself "I can stop drinking anytime I want to" but when was the last time you were actually able to stop? Try it, and it may be a revelation to find you just can't stop drinking.
The transition from heavy drinking to actual alcoholism happens with no fanfare. You don't even know it happened. The signs that a person has graduated from something that resembles normal drinking to alcoholic status include:
You never leave a glass of alcohol partially full.
When you run out of alcohol you have to obtain more immediately.
If you can't get it you suffer.
You resent people intruding during your "drinking time".
Your social calendar revolves around your drinking schedule.
You drink before an engagement at which you are going to drink.
You hide your drinking from others.
You lie to others about the volume and frequency in regard to your drinking.
You drink alone as a result of too many unpleasant incidents while you were drinking in public.
You are less reliable than you used to be due to alcohol interfering with your life.
There are other signs, but if you see yourself in even part of the list above, chances are very good you have developed an addiction.
The dead giveaway when you are truly addicted is you can't live without the stuff. As much as you hate to admit it to yourself, the addiction comes first, over and above anything else in your life. You may even orchestrate your schedule to hide the fact that drinking has taken first place
from yourself. You think, "I have my job and I take care of all of my responsibilities. I am a responsible individual", which is usually true in the beginning stages, but continued use will result in some very serious departures from responsible behavior. And worse, you begin to compromise your own standards.
Alcohol will keep you in the game for an incredibly long time, primarily because in the beginning stages of the addiction, most alcoholics are functional and able to handle their responsibilities with little trouble, naturally leading to the conclusion that drinking is having little effect on their lives. As the drinking continues, inevitably the ability to function will erode as the alcohol takes hold, and old ambitions, life dreams, and motivation become just that old, and for the most part unfulfilled.
