How many times have you been with your partner and you've had some sort of confrontation with a neighbor, family member or complete stranger and your spouse has gone out of his/her way to defend that perfect stranger?
I have seen this a dozen times and been on the receiving end of it too and it is a mighty betrayal when the person that should stand by your side no matter what, betrays you for a quiet life' and sides, sometimes very passionately with a person they know nothing about, have never met before and probably never will again.
For women, it may be the case that the confrontation is with a pretty female in which case your vision of the knight riding to save his princess falls flat when it appears his princess is her and not you. Perhaps you've seen a coat you like in a store and it is the very last one. As you reach out to take it, a pretty young something says Oh I wanted that' and as you pull the coat towards you, your husband says oh let her have it, she saw it first'. You don't want to hand it over, you know that you saw it first but how can you keep it now? The entire world is against you when your partner takes someone else's side; at least that is how it feels.
For men, it may be the plumber the wife is fussing around, telling him how poor' you are around the house and how your DIY skills got you into this mess in the first place. The plumber will shoot you embarrassed glances as she heaps on the praise for him and makes the air thick with criticism of you. She may make you the butt of her jokes. The final straw though is when she brings out the best china to make him tea and offers him the last piece of cake that you had got your eye on.
Some of you may be thinking, no, that's not me or my spouse, well that's great. But if this rings true for you, maybe now is the time to sit your partner down and have a chat about what loyalty and honor mean.
I make this point lightheartedly, but in truth, these small betrayals can gradually eat away at a marriage, as the hurt builds up. You might be a man who just wants a quiet life so finds it easier to cuss the wife than tackle the friend. You might be a woman who sees her negativity as harmless fun or an intentional plea to get the husband to brush up on his DIY skills. But for the partner on the receiving end, it can be something else, evidence that you don't love them.
Show you truly love your spouse by appreciating and protecting them, not just in private but in public too.
