OK! So you're learning NLP and you want to use a specific pattern on
yourself or a buddy or a client to change a behavior or an unpleasant
feeling. Of course, you'll find A LOT of patterns from which to choose
if you surf the web for just a few minutes. And it's good that you
learn as many change pattern as you can, because each pattern serves a
specific function. Just as you use a hammer to drive in a nail or a saw
to split a piece of wood in two (or three or four) pieces, you use a
pattern to achieve a specific goal. Now, there's one piece you MUST
learn to include in any piece of NLP or other changework if you want to
achieve results right now.
When I tell you, you'll think: "Well, of course..." Because it seems
obvious. But at the same time, it's really subtle. But when you master
how to do it, changing any behavior - with or without NLP - becomes a
breeze. So learn how to do this!
I'm sure that by now you want me to tell it to you straight up. And
that's why I'm writing this, isn't it? But before you get curious
enough to learn and master this pattern, let me mention something
else...
Have you ever heard of the phrase "the straw that broke the camel's
back?" It refers to an old story of Arab merchants that traveled in the
desert with their camels. These camel's, naturally, carried all their
merchandise. And all merchants knew that there was a specific weight
point beyond which they should never load their camel. Because if they
did, the camel would collapse. Past that point, even a straw would make
the camel collapse. From whence the expression, "the straw that broke
the camel's back.
But what does that have to do with NLP? What does that have to do with change?
It's so obvious you'll kick yourself for not thinking of it
yourself. But then again you might already have thought about it
already. So it might be your own idea that I'm just reminding you of...
But when you stick this at the beginning of any piece of changework
(NLP or otherwise), it makes it sink so deeply that change is automatic.
Do you really want to know? Well, I'll tell you... Here's the one
thing that, if you include it before actually changing anything, will
make the change stick forever - or at least for as long as you want it
to stick.
Here it is...
Break the camel's back.
I can hear you say: "What???"
That's right. Take yourself, your buddy or your client beyond the point of no return.
How?
Get them to feel how their present behavior is robbing them of
everything dearest to them. Lay it on them. Lay it thick. Tie in
everything you can think of that relates to what they're currently
doing. Keep doing it until you break the camel's back. Take them to the
point of no return.
After that, creating a new behavior will be a piece of cake. Without doing it, it'll be tough.
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