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There are things in life that happen to us that make our lives uncomfortable, and ill at ease. To take care of some of these things is like being wheeled to maternity, in excruciating pain, knowing you are going to be enraptured holding a baby soon. You smile at nine months of pregnancy ending, but you also know you will go through extreme pain first.
The good with the bad? The yin and the yang? Our service men and women have years of duty, most of the time four. To get to the end of their mission, so much pain and loneliness and damaging information must first enter their psyches. However, if they are Blessed to come home, they could build a future in a field of their choice, and have some money. High price to pay, I say. If they can handle the wounds of battle, some have survived pain to secure their future.
It seems like pain is a prerequisite to happiness. The joy follows sorrow? My mom passed away nineteen years ago, and I was devastated. Nine months later, I had my third child. I didn't think I could be any sadder than when my mom died, and I didn't think I could be any happier when my child was born. Within the same year. The yin and the yang. Hard to handle, and stay grounded and balanced, but I managed.
I am going through a divorce that has been extremely painful for the past year. I pray for a fair and equitable settlement, and once that is reached, I can stop so much of the worrying about paying bills, and not having enough money, and going to court several times. This will come to an end, although it hasn't seemed like it for the past year, and when it does, I will be relieved and ready to get back to my life. No more tension, no more fear, no more wondering what is going to happen. All the incidents that have brought me worry and pain will be over, and I will be ecstatic. The yin and the yang.
There are always two opposite ways of feeling going on, either together, or apart. Happiness and sadness. Two opposite ends of the spectrum. We've all worried about exams when we were in school. We'd study and feel nervous for the whole week. If we really did study, we'd be presented with good grades. Ah, relief, we passed. Our ups and downs are always intruding on each other throughout our lives. We could be lying on a chaise lounge, enjoying the warmth of the sun on our body, listening to music, getting some color, and all of a sudden, a bee stings, and we feel pain. The way we feel can change so quickly.
The question is, can we handle those quick changes? Can we go from happy to sad to happy again? Or do we stay stuck in one mode, and need to be rescued to get us out? Do we let this yin and yang lifestyle make us leery to be happy, knowing something bad is going to happen next? Or do we keep strong to our faith, and know we will never be given more than we can handle? I never thought I could go through any of the things I have gone through in my life.
However, I did, and I got through each step. I'm not saying I was unscathed in either direction, but I got through them. Feelings get hurt, hardships ensue, but perseverance to move towards a better time, is helpful, as well as working on the problem. Sometimes, we need to discuss things with a partner or friend to help us understand, absorb, and remove from our psyches and souls so we can move on with no baggage weighing us down.
There are lessons that must be learned during times of happiness, such as appreciating and enjoying what we have, and sadness, usually because of some type of loss. It's like when a baby cries, and all the great aunts and grandmothers say, "they're exercising their lungs." We, too, must exercise our willpower and our faith and our intellect and our honesty, and make things right in our own little world. We have to think, and use the tools we have to be fair and learn to correct situations we may find ourselves in at any point in our lives.
We can't just stay bogged down with the bad things. There is too much good that will pass us right on by, while we're wallowing in our own self pity. If we can remember that the life we are living is part good, part bad, part mediocre, part depressing, part elation, part fear, part bravery, then the ups and downs will be expected, and dealt with in a constructive way. And we will know from experience that some really good times are waiting just around the corner. These ideas can't be tucked away in the back of our minds, they must be in the forefront, ready to guide us in our daily decisions.
When something comes out of the blue, we need to be prepared to take care of it. Sometimes we have time to think it through, other times we need to make an immediate judgment call. If we are not ready, life could take a turn, and we may find ourselves inside a shell, so it seems, looking out at the world through a small hole, hoping nobody sees us. Oh, there are times for retracting to our favorite spots and enjoying the freedom of being alone. This is healthy for us, and it's revitalizing. It also helps keep our strength of mind cemented, as well as our bodies.
As long as we know that there is a balance between the good and the bad, the ups and the downs, the ins and the outs, and the yin and the yang, we can alleviate a lot of worry and fear from our lives. Not all, there is always something we can be in fear of, or worry about. The point is to remember that if today is bad, tomorrow may be better. If not, next week or next year, but things will turn around. It's the yin and the yang.
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