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Home » Categories » Entertainment » Humor » Diamond Hunting in the Wal-Mart Parking Lot » Reprint Rights » Printer Friendly

Myla Madson

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Myla Madson (3,353)
Myla Madson

Diamond Hunting in the Wal-Mart Parking Lot

Rated 4 out of 5
Rated an Average of 4.5 by 3 Readers ?
Submitted Friday, March 14, 2008
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I tell you, my oldest daughter is something else.  Last summer she would wake up at the crack of dawn and ride her bike to the mall.  It was only a short distance away and she would ride with friends so it wasn't so much a safety concern I was having, but rather how uncomfortable I felt about her hanging out at the mall all day and not doing something more constructive with her time.

When she started coming home with new shoes, Ipods and various trinkets, I really began to worry and confronted her one night demanding she explain how she was acquiring these things on a five dollar a week allowance.

To my surprise, she calmly stated that she didn't "hang" around the mall all day.  She was actually hunting for diamonds in the parking lot, both there and at the Wal-Mart nearby.

My daughter is the only person on this planet who can leave me speechless and as I stood there, unprepared for this explanation, she said in her most grown-up voice, "Perhaps I should explain."

She then proceeded to give me a science lesson coupled with deductive reasoning and I have to say I was once again left speechless.

She told me that changes in temperature have an effect on most material things, especially metal.  Different metals have different rates at which they respond to these changes.  This is the basis of how old mechanical thermostats work.

A length of coiled metal is attached to a bulb containing mercury and winds and unwinds back and forth as it expands and contracts according to room temperature, making and breaking electrical connections thus controlling the heating and cooling equipment.

On a hot summer day most folks, especially those that can afford to do so and therefore can also afford to wear a lot of jewelry, run their car AC at full blast whenever they go somewhere…that includes malls, shopping centers and so forth.

When they get out of their cars and step into the summer heat magnified by a black asphalt parking lot, the metal in their jewelry rapidly expands and diamonds sometimes pop out of their settings.

Now I have certainly lost my fair share of diamonds, albeit very, very small ones nearly invisible to the naked eye, but my daughter figured this was possibly how I, and therefore many others, inexplicably lost diamonds and jewels, (she also claims to have figured out where the lost sock in the dryer disappears to).

Anyway, after a little practice, my daughter told me it's relatively easy to discern a diamonds sparkle to that of the glass sparkles of your basic mall parking lot.  She smiled a devilish smile and said that is what keeps them hidden in plain sight!

In exchange for a small commission, her best friend's older brother then takes the diamonds to the pawn shop and gets what he can for them.  The money is divided equally amongst the prospectors and they spend the rest of the day shopping.

I was floored!  How dare she not turn these jewels over to her poor single mother who, by the way, just adores diamonds!  A pawn shop…are you kidding me?

I asked her if she had considered the feelings of the people who lost these diamonds and perhaps she should have turned them over to the mall's lost and found department.

She then asked me if I had ever gone to the mall's lost and found department looking for any of my lost diamonds and I admitted I had never thought to do so, until now.

She looked at me with a measure of satisfaction and said the mall folks would probably just take them for themselves anyway and she would be considered an accessory to a crime at that point.  I was too tired to argue her reasoning and too proud of her constructive thinking to punish her.

I asked her just how many diamonds had she found to afford all of the clothes and shoes and electronic gadgets she had acquired over the summer.

She explained that a lot of what they found were fake stones with no real value.  However, after exploring eBay awhile, she realized people would buy just about anything unique and unusual.

Cubic Zirconia is anything but unusual, but a Cubic Zirconia with a captured magic spirit in it that will bring fortune and fame into your life is quite the find.  A little creative writing and a made up Great Aunt who had practiced the dark arts, and poof, you now have a stone with value that desperate people are only to eager to buy.

The shocked look on my face made her quickly recant her story and she claimed to be pulling her momma's leg, but I don't know.  I worry about my daughter sometimes.  I hope she knows where that very thin line between creativity and dishonesty lies.  Actually, I'm quite certain she knows exactly where it lies and I should be more concerned with how often she has consciously chosen to cross it.

I had a long talk with her about all this, but to be honest with you, I now find myself doing my mall walking outside of the mall instead of inside like all my geriatric partners...diamond hunting of course!
 
For more from the mind of Myla Madson, go to http://www.MylaMadson.com
 
 
 
 



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Comments on this article:


» left by Leah - Cartoonist (12,608)
Leah - Cartoonist
(1 year 307 days ago.)

Reader Rating: 5 out of 5
I know where I'm going on my day off now! What an amazing story and an amazing daughter you have there. She will be a millionaire for sure with those skills!!
Respond to this comment
» left by Myla Madson (3,342)
Myla Madson
(1 year 307 days ago.)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"I'm hoping she will be rich one day, that's why I don't always punish her creative way of thinking, I don't want to end up in an old age home! I'm counting on my kids to take care of me in my old age. Clever girl I've got on my hands, huh? Thank you for commenting, I didn't even know the article was public yet, how did you manage to see it so quickly? lol"
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» left by Susan Thom (11,853)
Susan Thom
(1 year 306 days ago.)

Reader Rating: 4 out of 5
hi myla,
this was such a neat story, myself being the mother of 3 kids i have often wondered about where the line they cross really is. it was well written, funny, interesting, and oh, so possibly true-i go to walmart's and i lost a nice diamond i've never found? my head will be down from now on, thanks to your daughter. thank you for sharing,
best regards,
sue thom
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» left by Myla Madson (3,342)
Myla Madson
(1 year 306 days ago.)

Thankyou susan for your comments. You are always so kind. Kids are a funny thing, and mine are very creative and constantly keep me off guard! I really do not know what i would do without them, i think they keep me young. Thanx again lol
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» left by Leah - Cartoonist (12,608)
Leah - Cartoonist
(1 year 305 days ago.)

Reader Rating: 5 out of 5
Hi again Myla, I saw your articles rapidly as I enjoy reading your work so I was in your list, seeing what was new! I really do believe your daughter will be a success, diamonds in the carpark...classic! And of course very well written article.
Respond to this comment
» left by Myla Madson (3,342)
Myla Madson
(1 year 305 days ago.)

Thank you! As I am so new to SearchWarp I must ask, what is this list you speak of and how can I get one to put you on, I enjoy reading your articles as well! Thankyou for the kind words and encouragement! lol
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» left by Leah - Cartoonist (12,608)
Leah - Cartoonist
(1 year 304 days ago.)

At the top of your article page it says 'view all articles by Myla....'
So I was already reading one and then popped along via that to see the whole list!
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» left by Mike from Richmond (1 year 304 days ago.)
Reader Rating: 5 out of 5
What a clever idea. I love this article, well written and interesting
Respond to this comment

» left by Robert Melaccio, Sr. (5,095)
Robert Melaccio, Sr.
(1 year 303 days ago.)

Reader Rating: 3 out of 5
A good article it seems many can relate to and enjoyed.
Respond to this comment
» left by Myla Madson (3,342)
Myla Madson
(1 year 293 days ago.)

Thankyou for your comments, only three stars though? I really worked hard on this article and besides, my daughter has a complex and may take offense...okay, she is more stable than her mom so it's me who has the complex..three stars huh? Myla
Respond to this comment

» left by Michelle Mackin (4,736)
Michelle Mackin
(1 year 105 days ago.)

Reader Rating: 5 out of 5
Hi Myla,
 
I have been going thrugh your articles and I am loving them. Your daughter seems brilliant and creative. Must have got it from Mom!
 
Maybe I will be able to write again someday and use some of that kind of genious.

Respond to this comment
» left by Myla Madson (3,342)
Myla Madson
(1 year 104 days ago.)

Thank you so much for the nice comments and taking the time to read my articles.  I won't pry into why you are no longer writing but I do hope you start again someday soon.  Best of luck to you!

Respond to this comment
» left by Michelle Mackin (1 year 104 days ago.)
I have been writing on different topics, left and right brain. LOL I have just been so busy lately that I can't even put a decent article together for now. I will start again soon I hope.
 
Thank you much

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» left by Nikki from California (1 year 4 days ago.)
Reader Rating: 2.5 out of 5
I must say, that was histerical. You daughter is a very smart thinker, very logical. So did you ever find out if what she was doing was true? Well, at least I know where to find my fortunes now! Tell your daughter thanks! lol

Respond to this comment
» left by Myla Madson (1 year 4 days ago.)
Thanks for the comments, and yes, my baby girl is quite brilliant.  I'm sure everything she told me was true but I've turned a blind eye to the whole thing in hopes of some serious bling for my birthday!
 
 

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Article added to SearchWarp.com on 3/14/2008 8:21:36 AM.
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