Creating lasting change is something many of us find difficult. If it was so easy, none of us would ever fail to lose weight, or keep smoking despite wanting to give it up, continue to have disastrous relationships, work too hard, or continue to make New Year's resolutions which we fail to keep.
How often have you decided you need to do something to change your life, go on a diet, meet more people, give up listening to that negative voice in your head or cut down on your work commitments, to find yourself opening the biscuit barrel or booking another appointment almost immediately?
How often do you find yourself thinking I've broken my resolution so I might as well have another.?
Creating lasting change is so much easier if you stick to the principles outlined below.
1) Be clear about what you want to change and why?
Understand what is going well in your life. What is it you want more of? What is it you hate about your life and want you want to change? What difference would the change make to your life if you achieved it? What is the cost to the quality of your life if you don't?
The most dramatic changes happen when "shoulds" become "musts".
2) Believe it is possible to make the change.
Think about other examples within your life when you have succeeded in changing. Many of the changes seemed impossible yet you did it. If you can succeed in one area then there is nothing to stop you achieving in another other than your belief that it is possible.
3) Set clear, specific goals.
The more specific you are about what it is you want to change the easier it is to plan how to do it and to measure your success once you have achieved it.
4) Imagine Your Success is a reality.
Imagine yourself at a time in the future when you have succeeded in making the change. See the outcomes of your success. If you want to loose weight, see the slim you enjoying trying on a whole new wardrobe. See the admiring glances as you walk down the road and enjoy feeling good about yourself.
What difference does it make to your life? How do you feel about the fact you have succeeded? Remember nothing succeeds like success. Use your success to help you know you can make this future change.
5) You get what you focus on.
If you want a brilliant relationship but you only focus on work or financial success, you are far less likely to achieve a brilliant relationship. Set aside time and energy to make things happen in the area of your life you want to change.
6) Take action
Things will not change unless you make the decision to do things differently. Any change needs to become embedded and part of our daily lives if it is to make any sustained impact. Many of us do the single grand gesture and then loose interest. It is the small actions taken consistently which make a difference to our lives.
7) Ask for help
We have no hesitation in calling for a car mechanic or heating engineer when we want to sort our car or our heating system out, yet when we want to make fundamental changes to our lives we often try to do it alone.
Work with a coach, a personal trainer or mentor. They can help you clarify your thinking, set goals, plan how to achieve them and hold you accountable for the choices you make. If you think it too expensive think of the cost to the quality of your life of not achieving your desired outcome.
8) Surround yourself with positive people
If you want to give up something, drinking, smoking, you will find it easier to spend time with people who do not smoke or drink heavily. If you want to do something well, seek those who do it already and model their behaviours.
9) Maintain the pace
What action can you take today which will start you on your journey to success? Remember even the longest journeys start with the first step. Where do you want to be in 4 weeks time? In three months? By the end of the year? Set milestones so you can measure your progress. Make them achievable but with a level of challenge. If you experience a set back recalibrate your milestones rather than give up.
10) Celebrate your success
Celebrate each small victory. (Create celebrations which support, rather than work against, your goal. If you want to loose weight eating a cream cake is not a useful reward). Remember that positive reinforcement is a powerful motivator.
Think about 2008 and the changes you want to make. Every day is the start of the rest of your life so don't let the date stop you from making a resolution to improve your life.
Gina Gardiner is described by Ofsted as an “inspirational leader" by Investors in People as an “impressive coach and exceptional mentor who has developed an innovative and exemplary training scheme" for emergent, middle and senior managers.
Gina leads a wide range of training/facilitation activities with individuals, schools and other organizations. As Independent Consultant/Executive Life Coach and mentor she supports people at individual/organizational level to develop confidence, leadership; empowering them to see themselves as part of the solution. She is a Neuro Linguistic Master Practitioner and a qualified coach.
Author of “Kick Start Your Career" and “How YOU Can Manage Your Staff More Effectively"
Graduate Solutions is a branch of Gina Gardiner Associates offering training, mentoring and coaching to support the development of leadership from emergent to Senior Management level.
Recovering Workaholics founded by Gina Gardiner a self-confessed recovering workaholic.
Disclaimer: All information on this site is provided for informational purposes only! By no means is any
information presented herein intended to substitute for the advice provided to you by any health care or other professional
or organization.
