Log in to become a member of Joyce Shafer's Fan Club!
I received an e-newsletter with a comment from a highly successful individual arguing that positive thinking doesn't work and why. He also claimed that when he expresses this opinion, some people get their knickers in a knot, especially those who've spent decades reading the books and attending seminars and, he added, without any significant change in their lives. Here are some other points he made.
No amount of positive thinking will create a shift for a couch potato.
Nor for someone who has deeply held negative feelings about what they can accomplish.
The 20% for whom positive thinking works were achievers to begin with.
No amount of positive thinking will ever shift how life is experienced for a pessimist.
He makes some good points; but I'd like to look at and expand on them.
Positive thinking and repeating or writing affirmations without taking action is like looking at ingredients in your kitchen and wishing for a particular meal to happen. Now, it's possible you could feel hungry for something in particular, say, lasagna, and a neighbor invites you over or brings you a serving of lasagna. These are delightful occurrences; but more often than not, you'll have to get into the kitchen and cook.
If someone identifies their nature (some of it learned) as pessimistic, that's a huge step in the right direction. A pessimist doesn't need to become an optimist; he or she just needs to acquire, develop, and rely on tools that move him quickly to where he prefers to be. The writer of the article is correct about positive thinking not working because what we attract to us is based on our deeply held feelings. And, thank goodness. If the average person thinks over 12,000 thoughts each day, we could really get ourselves into some unpleasant situations if all of them came true.
I don't know if the commenter is correct about the 20:80 ratio but more than likely, some of the 80% he placed into non- or underachiever pessimists have probably had some successes in their lifetimes. What he feels will create results is visualization. My thought is that positive thinking, affirmations, and visualization work if and only if an individual can touch a feeling of having it.
Previously, I wrote that my triggered reaction (learned behavior) falls into the category of pessimist. Because I decided that it doesn't feel good to sustain this feeling, I've developed tools that help me move away from it so I can feel the way I prefer. My biggest motivator, and not just because someone wrote or said it but because I live it, is that whatever I feel the strongest is what I expand more of into my life. A significant distinction to get here is that this doesn't mean I never have challenges enter my life, it means I choose my thoughts, words, actions, and feelings about everything.
It's okay to identify what you don't like or want then identify the opposite or what's appropriate for you. The key is you have to let your feelings about what you prefer be stronger than what you want to change. Otherwise, your feelings stay on what you don't like and you get more of that.
You have to intend what you prefer. You have to commit to it, no mater what it takes. Think about anything you've ever been determined to do. You did it, right? Go ahead and write your vision or goal down. Visualize it. Affirm it's yours. But if you really want to charge it up, you're going to have to believe it will be yours and allow it.
How I get in touch with a feeling is to recall a moment when I felt a particular way, let's use successful as an example. I may start out bringing to mind what was going on and who was there, but I end up at what it felt like to know I'd chosen a target, taken aim, and hit it. I "stand" in the middle of the feeling until it's so familiar I can call it up at will.
Some of the actions you take may not work. Those are called Lessons about How Not to Do It. If you're committed to success about anything, your mantra can be, "There's a way and I'm going to find it or create it."
The way to do positive thinking may be to state, "I'm positive I can choose to feel differently at any time. I'm positive I can choose to be open to good things happening in my life. I'm positive I can find the actions that create the outcomes I choose."
It's not about what comes to us in life, it's about what we choose to do with what we have, who we are, and who we intend to be.
Joyce Shafer is an author; article writer; and offers freelance critiquing, proofreading, editing, and rewriting services for writers. Learn more about “Write, Get Published, and Promote: An Easy e-Guide for New and Aspiring Writers” at http://www.freewebs.com/writegetpubishedandpromote .
This author of this Article has choosen to make this article available with free reprint rights. Click here to copy this article.
» left by susan thom from nj (217 days 19 hours ago.)
hi joyce,
14 years ago, i was diagnosed with 350 ulcers in my intestines, Crohn's, dehydration, malnutrition, and depression. it was a good day! i lstayed in bed for months. I was lethargic, and couldn't seem to do anything but roll over. one day, decided i'd had enough. i sent my partner out for yogurt and gatorade and baby food, and i got myself back together. it was the power of the mind and positive thinking that did it, but it was because i wanted it! that did it. and the ulcers are gone. thanks for a well written story,
best regards,
sue thom Respond to this comment
» left by Hannah Quinn(19,455) Hannah Quinn (217 days 10 hours ago.)
Joyce,
I think the most important advice you give is that we have to 'allow it' not just think about it. Often when we think about it, it is a surface exercise. The real change has to be deep down where we live - and rarely even know it. As a survivor of abuse, I have to teach myself new core beliefs and allow myself to have what I want. In fact, I've had to teach myself - and am still teaching myself - that I am allowed to want things in the first place.
Thanks for the article.
Cheers, Hannah Respond to this comment
» left by Anonymous (215 days 21 hours ago.)
To Sue and Hannah -- Thank you for your comments. The willingness to make a choice and follow through can change everything. I wish both of you a wonderful life and a life filled with wonders. -- Joyce Respond to this comment
» left by Gerry Charbonneau(367) Gerry Charbonneau (212 days 13 hours ago.)
Thinking positively or negatively about life's many consequences is a socially learned behavior. Both modes of thought are legitimate. There is no rightness or wrongness involved.. It's a learned behavior. Parents teach their children. Children teach other children by example (especially in the school yard ). A cycle of learning is established. .
The rewards we attribute to these feelings are just as legitimate as the negatives we experience by doing nothing and becoming an intellectual couch potato. By taking action (or inaction) we claim an ownership to the response and live with the consequences of our decisions. Garfield the cat summed it all up nicely when he noted "if you're patient enough and wait long enough nothing will happen".
Disclaimer: All information on this site is provided for informational purposes only! By no means is any
information presented herein intended to substitute for the advice provided to you by any health care or other professional
or organization.
