We've heard it so many times...when one door closes, another one opens. Yet, we look so long at that closed door, we fail to see the one that's opened. We stand in our despair, longing for that closed door to reopen, remembering all that was inside. and knowing it will never be again. We cry and plead, begging to go back inside. We rage and pound our fists, trying in vain to break it down. We fall to the ground, spent, broken, filled with the pain of all that was lost. And all the while, the new door awaits. We just can't see it...yet.
But in time, and with the help of people who love us, we can finally stand again...stand and walk away from that door that's closed. We bring our memories, like carefully wrapped treasures, and walk. We might be walking differently, more slowly or perhaps with a limp. But we walk. And, after a while, that door that's blown open comes into sight. We see it, off in the distance, and brace ourselves against the winds of fear that blow full-force through our hearts. But we walk. And pretty soon, we arrive at that open door and all we have to do is walk through. That's it. Just walk through. Sometimes, in our wariness, we only peek inside, not yet ready to walk in. But, no matter. Once we've seen what's inside, we can't 'un-see'. It's there, burned into our hearts, and we can't go back. All that's left is to take a breath and walk through that open door. We can handle it. No matter what. We CAN handle it. And, for all the doors I've seen closed and all the new doors I've walked through, there's never been a single one forgotten.  Raja was the hardest door to close. She was so much a part of who I am, so much a part of my life. And the day I had to close that door, I really didn't think I'd ever even want to open another one. I thought, 'this is it'. There'll never be another one that comes close. But somewhere inside, I knew I couldn't spend the rest of this life without another dog. They are as much a part of me as the heart that pumps blood through my body. It's just who I am. So, I stood there, outside that closed door, waiting. I pitched a tent. I built a fire. I wasn't ready to leave. I just waited.
Now, it's time for me to walk. It's time for me to peek inside this new door that's opened, and see what waits for me. It won't be Raja. I know this. But I wouldn't want it to be. She will never, ever be replaced. But she goes with me now, everywhere I go, and I know she'll be here when I open this next door. She'll be wagging her tail and shoving me with her cold, wet nose...urging me to open the door and walk on in. And...I shall.
Camille Olivia Strate is an author and coach who takes great pleasure in helping folks 'remember' who they are. She spends much of her time with her beloved animals, her greatest connection to Source. When she's not coaching or writing, she can be found in the garden or on a trail, soaking in the marvels of Nature's offerings. Her latest book, "Whispers" is now available in eBook format. Hardcopy to follow soon! Visit her personal site at http://www.joyzachoice.com |
