Well, my pre-trial hearing is on June 16 th . My ordeal with the city continues. First it was the pickup truck with expired tags. Though it ran well and was moved around to mow the grass, it needed some exhaust work. I wanted to get an upgrade , but the city was too impatient.
It seems there was an ordinance passed, which I didn't know about, that says you cannot have a vehicle on your property that does not have current registration and inspection. Period. This Gestapo-esque rule was enacted to do away with someone who would park a car on their property and just leave it. Some folks would even attempt to repair their vehicles and leave the thing in pieces. This was not the case with my truck.
Through emails I was told the vehicle COULD NOT REMAIN ON MY PROPERTY. I used all caps because that was how the email came. The email mentioned the city's website, which I went to. The site claimed the vehicle could not be seen from the street, so I moved my truck, which I call "the Beast," to the back yard.
I emailed the guy who tagged my truck and told him so and that I got the idea from the city's very own widdle web site. His response- using upper and lower case this time- said that the truck had to become current on tags and inspection, or it had to be removed. Remember that previously he had said it COULD NOT REMAIN ON MY PROPERTY.
So I took it, under it's own well-running power, and had a muffler and some brake work done. I wanted to do it myself but I would not be able to do it in time for Generalissimo City Guy.
On the very day I took my truck to the shop we received a visit from the dog catcher. Someone had called in a complaint that my dog, a Golden Retriever named Dash, was loose and aggressive. He has been on a 60 foot cable run in my fenced back yard for quite some time, not loose, and he is never aggressive unless you are a bird drinking from his personal kiddie pool.
I asked how he could be loose and on a cable run at the same time. He said that was true, but asked to see his rabies and city tag. Dash gets the best food available. Dash, in fact, is spoiled rotten. Dash, also in fact, had missed his appointment with the vet and his city tags had expired. So I was ticketed.
It was quite a jump from righteous indignation to "oops, my bad."
I waited the appropriate number of days to make my appearance before the judge. I made my way to the Municipal Court and waited in line, humbled and contrite. It wasn't exactly a short line but it did move along nicely.
The twenty-something girl behind the glass took my two citations and walked away. After a couple of minutes she came back and I expected her to tell me to take a seat in the court room and wait for my case to be called. It had been more than twenty years since the last time I had to go to Municipal court. I have never been arrested or even accused of a crime in my life.
She came back and said, "Sir, you're in the wrong court. You have to go to Environmental Court. Do you know where that is?"
" I have never even heard of it," I said.
She told me where it was. I knew the building. It was another place I had not been to in over twenty years. The last time I was there you had no worries of encountering any kind of court. And who ever heard of an Environmental Court, and what does that have to do with a dog?
After plunking more money into another parking meter I finally found the place. It wasn't listed on the buildings directory but had an outside entrance. I walked into the room. To the left was a walled-off office area with another glass partition, like a doctors office. Off to the right was a walk through metal detector. Behind that was a hallway leading off to the right and next to it was a well armed, uniformed gorilla.
I told the middle-aged, obviously under-worked with too-much-time-on-her-hands lady I wanted to see the judge. I had seen an "all right, something to do" look on the two workers faces when I walked into the room so I was stunned when she took my two tickets and, after a minute, came back.
" I'm going to set you up for June 16 th ."
After a moment she gave me my copies and I left. My two Pre-Trial Hearing invitations.
Sigh...
Ken McCreless is just a guy who loves to write. No dazzling website or publishing milestones, just a love for words and a respect for the power they wield. Contact him at ken@kenmccreless.com
» left by sue thom from nj (1 year 161 days ago.)
hi ken, ain't life grand. i am going through a divorce, and walked outside one morning to find my durango gone in the night-no car. and my lawyer didn't even offer me his:) nor has he done anything to get mine back. his non responses are up to about 18 grand now! watch those trucks, good story,
best regards,
sue thom
i like the picture
» left by Ken McCreless(1,754) Ken McCreless (1 year 160 days ago.)
Hey, Sue. I'm sorry you have to endure something like that. Maybe it's time for a new lawyer. Just be careful and be sure to take good care of yourself. A generous dollop of self-spoiling seems to be in order. Thank you for the comments and hang in there.
» left by Ken McCreless(1,754) Ken McCreless (1 year 160 days ago.)
Now that would be a trial! Something like the Mad Hatters Tea Party! Thank you for reading, Steve.
» left by Marty RicKard(2,648) Marty RicKard (1 year 159 days ago.)
Dear Ken: Hate that you have problems, but love your article. Please keep us informed. I joined your fan club. Best, Marty RicKard.
» left by Ken McCreless(1,754) Ken McCreless (1 year 158 days ago.)
Hey Marty, I appreciate the kind words and the encouragement. I plan to do a follow-up as the story unfolds.Keep it Real...
» left by Robert Melaccio, Sr.(5,169) Robert Melaccio, Sr. (1 year 159 days ago.)
Hey do you live in Florida? Yes they have rules for everything. Thats what we old folk do create rules and get them enforced. Only kidding but I know what you are saying. I own a cople of vehicles I want to take off of my insurance to save a few dollars. theya re not wrecks, broken or anything yet i can't park them on "MY PROPERTY". All kinds of laws for that. Yes I have to pay to park then somewhere that I have to drive to and waste gas. yes and then I have to re register the same car with the state when I do want to finally drive it again. hey its leadership and brain power at its finest. Good luck. Respond to this comment
» left by Ken McCreless(1,754) Ken McCreless (1 year 158 days ago.)
Hey, Robert. No, I'm in Taxes- I mean Texas, home of the hippest religious sects and serial killers. I'm sure they justwant to collect a few more dollars so they can NOT fix the roads.
» left by Mr. Keith(2,407) Mr. Keith (1 year 158 days ago.)
A good article!
ANother thought to ponder are property taxes....If you think you own your land do not pay your rent (taxes) to the government for a few years and you will see who really owns all the land in America!!!!! Respond to this comment
» left by Ken McCreless(1,754) Ken McCreless (1 year 158 days ago.)
Thank you, Mr. Keith. Don't forget who actually brought down Al Capone.
» left by Camille Strate(1,493) Camille Strate (1 year 154 days ago.)
doncha just LOVE the bureaucrapsy? you MUST relay the results...as i have a feeling it's gonna be a HOOT! thanks, as always, for making me laugh out loud. you're the BEST, Ken. honesttogod! camille
Disclaimer: All information on this site is provided for informational purposes only! By no means is any
information presented herein intended to substitute for the advice provided to you by any health care or other professional
or organization.
