Finding time requires more than simple efficiency tools. You will be far more effective in using time as you develop successful strategies to resolve conflicts with others.
Do you find yourself so resentful at work or at home that you undermine yourself? Did a project everyone was counting on you to finish “somehow" get seriously delayed?
If so, avoid the trap of rationalizing, blaming others, or giving up on yourself. These simply deprive you of more of your valuable time.
Instead, use these 3 strategies to translate your time into effectiveness. Following these tips will help you develop assertiveness, productivity and self-esteem.
Tip #1: Face Yourself Squarely:
Don’t judge yourself. Just monitor your internal muttering. Are any of these time-waster messages familiar?
“I don’t want to!" That’s the voice of your resistance. You may even be able to envision yourself at three years of age, hands on hips, stamping your foot.
“You can’t make me!" and “I don’t have to!" Your Rebel’s attitude. Is your focus supporting yourself or proving you can balk at the other person’s request?
“I forgot!" This is your ‘Undercover Rebel’. You defy someone you’re angry at by undermining the project. You can approach this in two ways. Either you complete your task late or never complete it. Either one can lead to dire consequences and loss of trust.
Tip #2: Recognize Procrastination’s Flimsy ‘Payoffs’:
If you haven't owned up to what drives your choice to procrastinate, explore it now. Your power to use your time productively depends on your identifying and changing your motivation.
Do you enjoy seeing how you can hold things up?
Do you feel you can't refuse a task, but you can drag your heels?
Is your delaying tactic sending a message you can't say aloud?
Are there other payoffs?
Tip#3: Utilize These Strategies to Stop Procrastinating:
Identify the situation (not personalities) you resent, as specifically as you can. You can't alter others' personalities, but you have significant power to change the situation by relating more responsibly.
Brainstorm alternatives that fairly address the problem. Your goal is to arrive at solutions that take everyone's needs into consideration.
Develop assertiveness. Negotiate for what you need directly and appropriately. The more you work at this, the more skillful you will become at setting boundaries and resolving conflicts.
Develop a strong image of how much power you wish to claim over your life. Make these images as specific as you can. Consistently look to yourself to make your life work. The more initiative you take, the more quickly you can create effective strategies.
Ending procrastination will not only ease tensions at work and at home; it is also one of the best methods for increasing your real power and finding time!
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Paula Eder, Ph.D., The Time Finder, uses her 35+ years of experience to guide clients to effectively align values with productive time choices. For free weekly time tips & award-winning monthly Ezines, visit http://www.findingtime.net/ezine.html
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