I woke up last night at 2:45am and found myself remembering the dream that I just had. My dream was about me at a church where I was leading the Christmas Concert. Immediately when I woke up, God showed me that this is what I am supposed to be doing.
Now, let me give you some background here. Earlier last night, my Pastor called me to ask some questions about the upcoming Christmas Concert and evidently this is where the dream stems from. But, really, for the past few years, I have had a nudge in my spirit about doing this. You see, I went to school in music and was in several choirs. I never got a degree, but I know enough to do this. I am already one of the worship leaders in the church. I guess you could call me the Pastor's "right-hand" woman concerning music, although there are several other great worship leaders in the church as well.
I know that in the past several years, I was not ready to do this mentally, physically, and most of all spiritually. I was pretty much a basket case. Listening to the negative thoughts on a constant basis. How can anyone bring good fruit that way? You can't.
Thankfully, this has all but stopped completely. I have much more confidence in God than I have ever had in my life. I don't listen to the negative thoughts anymore because I know the promises that God gives me in His Word. I know that I can do this.
However, I need to make sure that this is the will of God. One thing that I have learned from Henry Blackaby in his "Experiencing God" course is that we need to put all situations through 4 channels, if they go through, then it is meant to be.
God's Word (He will show me what He wants from me through His Word)
Prayer (In my prayers, what is God telling me?)
The body (The church body should get the same thing in their prayer time as well)
Circumstances (Something happens where it is the only natural thing to do)
This is where I am at right now. I am at a crisis of belief as well, because I am not sure that I can do this. Actually, that is right, I cannot do this at all, but if it is the will of God, then He will give me the strength, knowledge, and courage that I need to accomplish this.
I know that if I have anything good in me, it only comes from our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
This is how we need to think. It is so easy to believe in God but what about believing Himbelieving what He says in His Word is true? We need to believe Him. I need to believe Him. I need to believe that He will give me what I need at the right time.
I have not spoken to my pastors, my council, or the members of the choir yet to see what they think. I want to ask them to pray about this. Would asking this be too prideful? I don't believe so, because I laid down my pride at the alter many months ago. Not that it cannot rise up again, which is something that I absolutely do not want to have happen, but it is a possibility that pride can come and altar my perception of the real reason behind me wanting to do this.
So why do I want to do this? Wellthere are many different reasons.
Even though our pastor has done a phenomenal job in the past 5 years putting these together all by herself, I feel that she is being stretched too thin. This coming fall will be very hard for her physically, mentally, and emotionally. (I won't get into the details here)
I want to use more of the gifts that God has given me to further His kingdom. (not mine)
They need to learn more about how to create music and not just songs.
To remember once again who we are really singing these songs to. Not to the audience but to Jesus Christ, Himself.
I can read music. (I am the only one in the church who can, with the exception of our Senior Pastor who can read only a little bit) I have to say, this can be frustrating at times as I was brought up reading music. I have had to lay this down at the altar several times in the past.
To use the leadership skills that God has given me over the past 5 months or so while taking the Lay Leadership Course.
All of this to say that if we don't trust in the Lord and we don't use the gifts that He has given us for His glory, then we might as well not be Christians. ReallyI mean it. It is a complete waste of God's divine creativity to waste the talents that He has bestowed upon us.
Prayers are requested, thoughts are welcome, and any tips on leading music choirs would be great!
God Bless!
Jennifer Johnson is a Christian who wants to bring truth and knowledge of Jesus Christ to the world, to expose the wiles of the enemy, to worship our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, and to stand on the firm foundation of God’s Word. She is a counselor of sorts as she is not a doctor and does not have a degree but she is one who wants to offer herself, based upon God’s Word and her painful experiences, to those in need of spiritual, emotional, physical, and financial healing.
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