Being born and raised in Chicago, I have trouble understanding county fairs. When I came downstate in the late 70s I found quite a culture shock when it came to the local county fairs. I saw entire businesses shut down, people take a vacation week and almost everything grind to a halt when it was fair week.
Of course I have been to several Logan County Fairs. It isn't by any means a huge monstrous fair like the state of Illinois Fair. Or maybe it is since I have never been to a state of Illinois fair in my life.
This year with my new responsibilities with the Lincoln Daily News I will be at the fair a great deal. It will be an opportunity to see everyone in the county and make sure they know what I am now doing locally.
I hope it isn't too hot as I still can't get used to the entire event and hot weather makes it even harder to enjoy the long days.
In some ways a rural fair is neat. Seeing kids win ribbons for raising a cow or pig or chicken or a lamb makes one smile as you see the youngster's hard work paid off with recognition. I like that.
But then it turns a little strange as that prize cow or lamb gets auctioned off with the proceeds going to something special in the rural world. I find it weird because it means the champion animal is now on its way to getting turned into chops or mullion or T-bones.
I suppose that proves this group of animals isn't that intelligent. If they were, one would suspect they would throw the competition just to make sure they didn't win and thus be turned into food.
The fair has its mini-amusement park of course and that is a joy to youngsters and a worry to adults. I recall 15 years ago or so when our young son wanted to go on all the things that spin or bounce up and down and mom and dad took turns going with him and then throwing up when the ride was over.
There is a ton of greasy smelling, great tasting food at a fair. From funnel cakes to bags of fries to piles of cheese steaks grilled in their own fat, a person's cholesterol goes up just walking down the midway smelling all the things.
I remember passing on the whole fair experience one year and opting instead to just eat a large can of lard in lieu of the fair food.
There is an art show at our fair and I enjoy that. I have always admired artists and in fact painted for about a decade, giving it up for health reasons. I became tired of being yelled at for leaving open tubes of paint on the floor that when stepped on went every where. The rug in the TV room where I used to do my work eventually ended up looking like a Jackson Pollack painting only fuzzier. When my wife explained to me where she intended to store the paint if I didn't do a better job myself, I put my back to the wall and just gave the hobby up completely.
There are a few big events at a fair that a city boy just can't figure out. The tractor pull makes no sense to me nor does the demolition derby which is the grand finale at our fair. The cars are close together so that no one can get really hurt and there are so many entrants that the event lasts all night. I don't know what the fascination is. It looks like nothing more than a typical rush hour on Chicago's Lake Shore Drive to me.
I will have to help cover some fair events as there are many things happening at the same time. I won't take the livestock competition however because I could skew the results. I fear I might go up to a cow or a pig and whisper in their ear that if they win they are dead meat. I would hate to see a youngster cry because his animal found out what happens to the winners and tanks the competition.
Freelance writer, columnist, author and writing coach, ex-Chicagoan Mike Fak presently resides in Central Illinois. More information about Mike's services are available at his home website www.mikefak.com
Mike currently writes humor columns for searchwarp bi-weekly and is the managing editor of www.lincolndailynews.com
Nobody does fair food like they do in the Midwest. I went to the Illinois state fair a couple of years ago and I have been to Ohio's state fair a million times. All the rest of the stuff besides the food is boring. I am fortunate enough to have four children, so they can go on the rides together, so I don't have to spin for ten minutes and throw up. Although I eat so much fried cheese, corn on the cob, steak on a stick, and funnel cake that I usually get sick anyway. After I moved to Florida last year, I went to the local county fair. They boiled the corn, instead of roasting it. The steak on a stick was dry. Anybody who says they know how to cook in the south is a liar. About the only thing they fix well down here is iced tea. Enjoy the fair. Eat lots of good stuff!!!!!!!
Mike - these fairs bring communities together and kids raising livestock get to be rewarded for hard work, even if they do not win ribbons. We need more local stuff. We need more things to bring us together and affirm that there are good things going on in the midst of all the other mess. Hope you enjoy your new "beat"!
Jane you are so right. At the Lincoln Daily News I started a feel good section called Close Up where all we do is brag about good things the community does. It is corny, it is old fashioned and people love it. Thanks, Mike
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