The following is a talk I gave to a client at a weekend bootcamp. This is a great example of my direct one-on-one coaching during bootcamps.
Whenever you try too hard in life to get people to like you, you push everybody away.
When you do this, you're too over the top and you're generally not listening to people. You're actually overwhelming them.
It's like a Golden Retriever: have you ever gone over to someone's house and they have a Golden Retriever, and you've never met this dog before, but the dog will just not leave you alone? It just keeps running over to you, bringing you its ball, and all of its toys and everything?
In a dog, this is a great quality. In a human – well, you don't want to be a human Golden Retriever.
Both men and women do it. When people try too hard, it's just too much. You get in somebody's face, and they automatically want to back down. I watch when a guy will go out there and be a human Golden Retriever – and I watch the way women react. At first, they will find him attractive, because he has great energy, but then after two minutes, she'll just try to shoo him away.
She hasn't gotten to know the guy in those two minutes, because generally the human Golden Retriever is just spitting out hyperactive words the whole time instead of connecting.
By tuning yourself down a little bit, and by listening and being intriguing, you're no longer going to be a human Golden Retriever – you'll be a person. And that's all that it is about. It's about connecting with people in a genuine way.
After this weekend, some of you guys will keep in touch with some of the guys here a little bit longer than you might keep in touch with some of the other guys – that's just life. That's chemistry.
So stop trying so hard. You're such a deep and genuine soul. You're a good person all around. You don't need to try so hard to prove yourself to other people. So stop overtrying
Todays video dives even deeper into life and how to present yourself to a total stranger with confidence.
You do not want to be the human golden retriever.
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