Anyone familiar with my philosophy will know that I distinguish the
southwest from the southeast points of the intercardinal axial compass
on the basis of an equivocal female hegemony in chemistry over an
upended male position of antiphysics-cum-pseudo-physics (which from now
on we shall simply refer to as pseudo-physics) from an equivocal male
hegemony in physics over an upended female position of
antichemistry-cum-pseudo-chemistry (which shall likewise be simplified
to pseudo-chemistry), thus in effect distinguishing water over
pseudo-earth (or pseudo-vegetation) from earth (or vegetation) over
pseudo-water or, in vulgar parlance, piss over pseudo-shit from shit
over pseudo-piss, the former pairing akin, in sartorial terms, to a
flouncy skirt over flared pants and the latter akin to tapering pants
over a tapering skirt, as though in a distinction, generally speaking,
between sensuality and sensibility or, more correctly, sensuality and
pseudo-sensibility on the one hand, and sensibility and
pseudo-sensuality on the other, the centrifugal and the centripetal, a context governed by objectivity in female vein and one governed, in male vein, by subjectivity.
So what does all this have to do with ale and stout beers? Let me
answer that query in the following way. Taking our gender and sartorial
parallels from the above, we should be able to argue, with some
justification and overlooking for the moment populist notions that would tend to intuitively confirm this, that bottles parallel skirts and cans parallel pants (or
jeans), since bottles tend to be transparent (and water-affirming)
whereas cans are somewhat opaque (and earthy), a distinction, after
all, between female and male criteria. Therefore we should be able to
distinguish bottles over cans on the one hand, that of the southwest
point of the intercardinal axial compass, from cans over bottles on the
other hand, that of the southeast point of the said compass, as though
in a distinction, once again, between flared skirts and flared pants vis-a-vis
tapering pants and tapering skirts.
But what is it, you may wonder, that leads one to infer a flared or
a tapering parallel to the respective types of bottles and cans? Not
necessarily the shape of the bottle or can, nor even of the top or
widget. What seems to satisfy this requirement is less the medium in
which beer is stored than the nature of the beer itself, i.e. whether
it lends itself to a watery (piss) or to an earthy (shit) correlation,
which, so far as I am concerned, is precisely the distinction between
light ale and/or lager and stout and/or brown ale, to simply the options.
In other words, chemistry over pseudo-physics = bottled light ale over canned light ale, whereas physics over pseudo-chemistry = canned
stout over bottled stout, the former pairing
exemplifying the overall influence of female criteria and the latter
... that of males, as, I would argue, would that between lager and brown ale.
Therefore a female-dominated distinction between, for instance, bottled light ale and
canned light ale has to be distinguished from a male-dominated distinction
between canned stout and bottled stout, the former pairing susceptible
to identification with flared phenomenal (relative as opposed, like say
dresses to absolute) clothing and the latter to what tapers as though
from the hegemony not of water (piss) but of earthiness (shit).
Now
what is particularly interesting about this finding, if I may so put it, is that traditionally the southwest point of the
intercardinal axial compass, in which volume is hegemonic over
pseudo-mass, would be identifiable, in overall axial terms, with
church-hegemonic (catholic) criteria, whereas the southeast point of
the said compass, in which mass is hegemonic over pseudo-volume, would
be identifiable, in overall axial terms, with state-hegemonic (puritan
or protestant) criteria, which is also, as far as these lower-order
points of the axes in question are concerned, to make a distinction
between Gaelic football and Association football, since the traditional
noumenal, or upper-order, poles to these points tend to encompass
hurling in the catholic case and rugby in the protestant one, where the
religious correlations would be rather more Roman Catholic
with, certainly in Eire, an Old English rather than Gaelic connotation and, in England and Britain generally, Anglican rather than Puritan.
Be that as it may, the British Isles has long been a rather
paradoxical place, where people tend to be at cross-purposes with
themselves in so many contexts, not least in terms of beer-drinking
habits, which has seen people of Irish Catholic descent traditionally
favouring stout (the beer of the parliamentary/puritan southeast point
of the intercardinal axial compass) and people of English Protestant,
if not puritan, descent favouring ale, not least in its light or
lager-like manifestation, which, as I have argued, is relative to the
catholic southwest point of the said compass and not at all to anything
dominated, in physical fashion, by male criteria.
So not only is it paradoxical but extremely ironic that so
many Catholic Irish should identify their beer-drinking habits with an
English-derived beer while many of their English and even British
counterparts favour light ale or lager, as if it connoted with
something puritan and male! I think I have shown, with correlations
based in a degree of logic, that this is simply not the case, and I could also add
to the misery of these 'where ignorance is bliss' people by pointing
out that, in overall elemental terms, rock 'n' roll connotes with the
catholic, or lapsed catholic, southwest point of the intercardinal
axial compass while classical, not least in a strings-oriented
symphonic mode, connotes with the protestant if not puritan
southeast, and therefore with all that is axially contrary, on
phenomenal (lower order) terms to female hegemonic criteria. Put
simply, the southwest is about spirit and pseudo-ego, while the
southeast is about ego and pseudo-spirit. This is precisely the
distinction between chemistry and pseudo-physics on the one hand, and
physics and pseudo-chemistry on the other, our flared skirt and pants
pairing vis-a-vis their tapering counterparts in pants and skirts. So
light ale is the beer of piss-drenched singing rock 'n' rollers and
stout the beer of shit-tight scroll-reading orchestral bow-scrapers.
Wow!
Perhaps we should leave a more detailed examination of the distinctions between light ale and lager on the one hand and stout and brown ale on the other to another time, before things become too complicated.
John O'Loughlin is a self-taught philosopher who has been writing mostly works of a philosophical nature for over three decades. Besides publishing himself through his company Centretruths Digital Media, he has been published by Lulu on the Internet, and considers himself to be the founder of the ideological philosophy of Social Theocracy and/or Social Transcendentalism, the former term having more political and the latter more religious significance, as though a distinction between state and church. Both, however, appertain to what he terms 'the Centre', a concept which transcends state/church relativity as we generally understand it. His works explain and justify Social Transcendentalism in relation to the concept of religious sovereignty, which he regards as the ultimate mode of sovereignty. Mr O'Loughlin is 57 and lives alone in north London.
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