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Dear Prospective Family,
My name is Mitzi and I'm 2 years old. I am currently residing in the Animal Shelter on Rodeo Drive. My mother was a Jack Russell terrier and my dad was a Rat (no pun intended) terrier. I would just like to let it be known before any of you beautiful, wealthy and extremely narcissistic Hollywood celebrities adopt me - I have a few rules.
Please provide me with love, affection, a good home and plenty of doggy treats. I don't like venturing out much. So, don't stuff me in your $1500 Prada bag and parade me around like your Cabbage Patch Doll. All the lights from the paparazzi scare me and I would hate to ruin your bag....
The noise at your so-called "red carpet" events is horrible. It takes me days to get rid of the ringing in my ears. You don't have to haul me around like a limp dishrag to prove to the public or anyone else how much you love me. I'm content just resting peacefully at home in my Kenneth Cole doggy bed - yes, I too like the finer things in life.
I've seen my friends come back to the shelter heart broken after you discard them for your next puppy-of-the week. Please be considerate of my wishes. I just want a normal life.
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Dear Prospective Family,
