Wedding invitations are the focal point of your wedding stationery, providing the first glimpse into the style and formality of the wedding. But ordering, wording, and addressing invitations can be confusing without a little guidance. Here are some tips to help you through it:
General Invitation Advice
• When to send them - send wedding invitations 6-8 weeks before the big day. (if you think your guests will need more advanced notice, send save-the-date cards as well) Try to order invitations 3-4 months in advance to ensure they go out on time.
• How many to order - Order about 25% more than the number of guests you're inviting - you're bound to make mistakes or make last minute additions.
• Consider hiring a calligrapher for an added touch of elegance. Make sure to factor in the additional timing to ensure your invitations go out on time.
Wedding Invitation Wording Etiquette Many rules apply to wording and addressing invitations. Here are some of the basics to ensure yours are faux pas-free:
- Dates and times should be spelled out (half after four o'clock in the evening, not 4:30pm, and the twenty-second of April, not April 22)
- Mr. and Mrs. are abbreviated and Jr. may be, but the title Doctor should be spelled out
- No punctuation is used, except after abbreviations and between the city and state.
- An invitation to just the wedding ceremony does not include an R.S.V.P
- "Hosting" the wedding can mean anything from a set of parents helping to plan the event, inviting the guests, or covering the costs:
- If there is one set of hosts, list their names at the beginning.
- If both sets are hosting, list on separate lines with bride's parents first.
- If one set is hosting but you want to include the other set as well, note their names under their son/daughter's name.
- If you are hosting your own wedding, begin with the request line and state parent's relationship under your name.
- If you and both sets of parents are hosting, list your names first followed by "together with their parents" before the request line.
Addressing Etiquette
- No abbreviations, except for Mr., Mrs., Ms., and Jr. States must also be spelled out.
- If one of your single guests is bringing a date that you know personally, send that person a separate invitation instead of including "& Guest" on the inner envelope.
- If you are unable to obtain the name of a single friend's guest - indicate on the inner envelope that they may bring a guest - NOT on the outer envelope. (this looks awkward)
- Unmarried couples who live together should receive one invitation, where their names are listed in alphabetical order and on their own lines.
- Invited guests who are living together as roommates, not couples, should each receive their own invitation.
- List the names of children under the age of 18 who still live at home on the inner envelope instead of "& Family" which can be very ambiguous and easily misinterpreted. Children over the age of 18 should receive their own invitation, regardless of their living situation.
- The traditional, married couple recipient should follow this format:
Mr. & Mrs. Ryan Parker
2211 First Street, Apartment 3
San Diego, California 92109
Wedding Invitation Wording Samples
Gone are the days when wedding etiquette mandated that the bride's parents, and the bride's parent's only, hosted the wedding. Today anyone can foot the bill, and with modern familial arrangements often anything but nuclear, there is no straightforward rule for wording invitations. We've sorted through the confusion to bring you wording samples for the most common arrangements:
Simple, Traditional Format
[proper names of those hosting] (official hosts line)
request the honour of your presence (request line)
at the marriage of their [relationship of the bride to the host]
[bride's first and middle names]
to
[groom's full name],
the [day of the week] of [day and month of wedding]
at [hour] o'clock in the [time of day] at
[name of wedding venue] in
[city, state]
Reception to follow
Divorced Parents
[proper name of host]
requests the honor of your presence
at the marriage of [his/her] [relationship of the bride to the host]
Or, if parent is remarried and hosting with new spouse:
[proper names of those hosting]
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of [his/her] [relationship of the bride to the host]
Or, if divorced parents are mutually hosting:
[proper name of mother]
and
[proper name of father]
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their [relationship of the bride to the host]
You can find even more wedding invitation wording samples here, and this complete guide to wedding invitations and stationery will walk you through planning every piece of your stationery suite.
Cori Russell is editor for Elegala.com and Gala Weddings Magazine - and a recent bride. Elegala.com is a complete weddings and wedding planning resource with a national directory of wedding venues and services, how-to guides, expert advice, checklists and photo galleries to walk brides and grooms through every step of the planning process.
Cori graduated from Tulane University with a Bachelor's degree in communications.
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