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Peer pressure is mounting in our society today, and it's almost out of control. Walk down the hallway at any high school or college, and guess what you will see. Teens and Young adults all wearing the lastest Aeropostle, Abercombie, American Eagle, Jordans, Sketchers, and what ever else has been deemed 'cool'. You'll see them flinching lighters to smoke, you'll see hands trading forbidden'objects' without even a thought. Someone will laugh, and a group of people will echo, for the sake of looking cool, even if they don't agree with what was said.
Teens who normally refrain from such activities will start using drugs or drinking, going to parties, wearing the cool clothes, just becase they want to fit in. Popular television shows will be discussed, as will movies, and you better be in the know or you will be left out. Certain music will be deemed 'cool', and the rest will be called dumb or screechy. Everyone will have an ipod or mp3, or even the rare walkman. Half the students won't even know what a 'walkman' is. Some kids will do anything to fit in, even if they hate being like everyone else. Some girls, and guys, believe that being thin will make them fit in, so they develop eating disorders.Some kids get so depressed and angry because they feel like they don't fit in and they turn to destructive behavours like self injury or drug abuse.Some even go as far as suicide.Just because they want to fit in.
Looking at me generation you have to wonder what we teens are doing wrong. Not that society made us this way, but what a wild bunch we must be.
The problem with peer pressure is that no one wants to be that odd ball. Everyone wants to fit in, and be like everyone else.So school gets put off to hang out and be cool. Going hungry or skipping bill payments to get the coolest fashion may occur. But is there a way to avoid peer pressure? Is there a way to fit in and still be different?
The answer to both questions is yes. The first one has two answers.
So how can we avoid peer pressure? Well firstly you could be the one causing the peer pressure, setting the trend, but stop. You are only giving in to others and following even if you are leading. And secondly, ignore it. It sounds simple, but it's not. You can say no, dress differently but not wierdly, refuse to be one of the crowd, and eventually everyone else will learn that they don;t have to be just like everyone else.We are all different.Which is how it should be. Saying no is hard, when everyone else your age is having sex, doing drugs, getting drunk. It's really hard. But it can be done.
Is there a way to fit in and still be different? Yes, there is. Many ways actually. If your friends won't accept you for who you are, they aren't your friends.Get new ones. Run with a different crowd, be friends with people from all social groups. Dance to a different drum, and you'll be just fine.
Casey is an 18 year old college student, majoring in English and History. She plans to get her Ph.D one day. She writes articles based on personal experince, in the hope that someone will learn from he rmistakes.
I applaud your article. You explained things very well. I'll add my own thoughts. Peer pressure does not end at high school graduation, or college graduation. It is a lifelong pressure. As long as we all have peers, we will have peer pressure. The only antidote to this pressure is self confidence. The only way for anyone, including a child, to develop self confidence is for that person to spend as much time as necessary figuring out who she is and what kind of life works for her. Growing up is really about people developing an awareness of who they are and what works for them. That happens through honest self assessment. There is no typical age when this process is complete in the "average" person. The educational system I grew up with did things just the opposite - instead of giving me the room to figure out who I am, it wanted to tell me who I am. I think a lot of kids get that pressure from the school system. The ones who give in to it end up unhappy.
The issue of self confidence goes much deeper than this. A lot of adults, including teachers, have not figured out who they really are. They cannot be a helpful guide to anyone until they emotionally mature themselves.
I happen to have found all of my friends outside of the high school I went to. I remember I used to drive to my girlfriend's school to have lunch with her during my own school's lunch break. It was a hoot. It was the best part of my day. After my girlfriend and I started dating on a regular basis, we introduced her friends (all girls) to my friends (all boys). My friends and her friends paired off into their own relationships. The group of us did a lot of things together. My girlfriend and I were considered the leader of the pack because the group began with our relationship. It was a lot of fun. We talked about a lot of things and had our own little community. The group lasted several years. My girlfriend and I lasted several years longer.
By the way, if you happen to know anyone who is being picked on in school, there is something very easy they can do to put a stop to it. The person being picked on has to wait until the next time the bully says something mean. The next time the bully strikes, have the person who is being picked on say to the bully: Why do you need my attention so much? Don't you have any friends? If the bully says: "Yeah, I have a lot of friends!" The reply should be: "You'd rather spend time with me than your friends? You like me that much?" It works like magic. That will embarrass the bully into leaving his prey alone. The reason it works? The kids with the lowest self confidence become the bullies. This line tells the bully that his low self confidence is really obvious. The bully doesn't want to be anywhere near the person who knows the truth about him.
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Article added to SearchWarp.com on Thursday, September 04, 2008 View other articles written by Casey Starkweather(236)
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