There is a great old fable that speaks of the devil offering all the tools of his trade to anyone who would pay their price. They were spread out on the table, each one labeled – hatred, malice, envy, despair and sickness – all the weapons that everyone knows so well. But off on one side, apart from the rest, lay a harmless-looking, wedge-shaped instrument marked discouragement. It was old and worn-looking, but it was priced far above all the rest.
When asked why, the devil explained: "Because I can use this one so much more easily than the others. No one knows that it belongs to me, so with it I can open doors that are tightly bolted against the others. Once I get inside, I can use any tool that suits me best."
There is an epidemic plaguing our society…a very real problem that is causing havoc within while undermining the success and happiness that we look for, strive after and actually deserve. That condition is discouragement. It chips away at the foundation of who we are. It masquerades as a simple and temporary condition, one that is fleeting and unsecured. However, that is far from the truth.
Discouragement is like a small splinter that one can barely see. You are not sure where you picked it up, or even exactly where it is at. You even try to ignore it because whatever it is will probably go away. It stays there festering, growing and irritating all around itself. It shows you signs, but you tend to ignore it… it will go away. When it gets big enough to really get your attention, you try a quick fix, put a band-aid over it and figure that sooner or later it will go away.
All this time you are not aware there was a poison on that splinter, flowing into your bloodstream, contaminating your entire being. Your cells, tissues, muscles, bones, the very structure of your body and even your immune system, have been affected. You start feeling run down, your body hurts, you can't figure out what is going on (remember you had put a band-aid over it and you can't see it), but you know that something is amiss.
Until you identify the problem (there really is something wrong), discover the cause (the poisoned splinter), and treat it, (remove the splinter and treat the infection), the problem will continue to plague you.
Discouragement causes us to see ourselves as less than we really are – (Of course I got a poisoned splinter, I was dumb enough to go for a walk in the desert); causes us to blame others for our condition – (You were the one who wanted me to go with you for a walk in the desert); hurts our self-image – (Great, I am so unlucky that of course I would be the one to get the poison splinter); and causes us to lose focus of the truth – (I don't know how this happened, I haven't gone anywhere!)
It may start as an innocent comment from a parent or friend. It may just be something said in jest, but happened to fall on ears that were more sensitive than usual. Discouragement is also a way that others, who are probably also affected by this condition, use to make themselves feel better. For example: You overhear your parents talking about not knowing where they are going to get the money for new ice skates for you. Or, your sister saying with a giggle, "You're too ugly and uncoordinated to be an Olympic Star!" Just because Sam is not able to ice skate very well, he tells you (who loves to ice skate and is pretty good at it), that you will never be able to qualify for the Olympics because your family is poor and poor people never go to the Olympics.
What has just happened is that you are now discouraged. Your thoughts linger on maybe they are right; maybe you are too ugly, uncoordinated and poor to be an Olympic Star. Even though you practice for hours a day, have been told by coaches that you have talent; love what you feel like when you are out on the ice, you now figure that it is just a waste of time. Nothing will ever come of it. Why even bother to accept the scholarship? What difference will it make in anyone's life if you even go to the Olympics? Your family is poor and don't believe in you… so why should you be any different?
Now, the fact may be that you are an amazingly talented ice skater. You have overcome tremendous odds in order to do what you do so well. You are actually an encouragement to others who face diversity and have shown them, by your very actions, that anything can be accomplished if you believe in yourself, and never give up. But the sad thing is that because you were infected by discouragement, didn't know how to identify it and destroy it at the very core, it took a hold of you and hurt you. It canceled out your dreams. It changed the outcome of your life. You never had the chance to be an example of what is good in people. You never had the chance to feel the pride in yourself when you succeeded. You never went to the Olympics because you never tried. Discouragement stole all that from you.
Dale Carnegie, the eternal optimist, said: "Tell a child, a husband or an employee that he is stupid or dumb at a certain thing, that he has no gift for it, and that he is doing it all wrong and you have destroyed almost every incentive to try to improve. But use the opposite technique, be liberal with encouragement; make the thing seem easy to do, let the other person know that you have faith in his ability to do it, that he has an undeveloped flair for it, and he will practice until the dawn comes in at the window in order to excel."
In October of 1941, Winston Churchill gave a speech at his old school, Harrow, where he said, "This is the lesson: never give in, never give in, never, never, never, never-in nothing, great or small, large or petty-never give in except to convictions of honor and good sense. Never yield to force; never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy." Little did Mr. Churchill know that his infamous words would have such a profound influence in a world so different from his own. Or is it?
It had to be true for everyone involved during World War II, that discouragement, from time to time, would sneak in to undermine the success and survival of them all. Mr. Churchill must have understood how debilitating and destructive discouragement could be. Therefore, through the power of words, encouragement and understanding, with purpose to thwart any splinter of discouragement, he constantly used everything in his arsenal to win his war. Fortunately his arsenal was equipped not only of artillery, but included his wit and understanding of humanity as well. Are not all battles won by the side which believes more in themselves than the other?
Living with discouragement is a choice. We can choose to be discouraged or we can choose to rise above the situation. Once we discover that it is indeed discouragement that is festering in our life, we can reverse the affects so that we are free from the affliction. Douse the flame of discouragement with a positive attitude and belief in yourself. Remember to never, never, never give in, and while the author is at it, never, never, never give up on yourself. What you see today is the result of your thoughts yesterday.
Be well my friends. You can do it!
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