Judging a person is very easy. But its really very difficult to know why a person did like this or that! even I used to do that very often. But in January this year when I attended a seminar on counseling, my old perspective of judging a person changed completely. I am going to share the same topic with you today that we discussed in the seminar that day.
We were discussing about the Samaritan woman whom Jesus asked for water in John chapter 4. After we finished reading the whole story, the resource person asked us to mention the characters of that woman. I was the first person to speak out. I said, she was not of a good character. He smiled and said, this is a nice way to mention her characterinstead of saying bad character, you said not of a good character. Then other participants also started mentioning her characters. She was an adulterous woman, she was a quarrelsome woman, she was unfaithful and so on.
The resource person asked us to read the passage once again, slowly and carefully. We did so. Then he asked where did you find in the passage, which talks about her character that all of you mentioned just few minutes ago? How did you know about her characters? We were all mum. I was thinking, what to answer. Then he said, you all must have mentioned her character basing on verse 16-18, where Jesus asks about her husbands. Then he asked us to read Matthew 22: 23-27 where Sadducees asked Jesus, Master, Moses said, If a man die, having no children, his brother shall marry his wife, and raise up seed unto his brother, then they gave an example of a wife who marries all seven brothers according to the Jewish custom. The resource person said may be she married all five of them just to keep the tradition or custom. Later all of them were dead. Just imagine the condition of that woman in a male dominated society. People must be shunning her for eating up five husbands (as commonly people say). A lonely woman where shall she go? May be she took the shelter under a man with whom she didnt marry yet. The resource person looked at us and said cant we give her a benefit of doubt? The only mistake she committed is staying with that man without marrying him. He smiled and asked us, Counselors! What do you think? Nobody answered. Everybody was cursing himself or herself for being so mean and inconsiderable towards that woman. I was thinking how quick am I to judge others? Cant I just listen to the pain quietly? If I will be judgmental I cannot be a counselor.
At the end of the session everybody was looking at that woman in discussion as Jesus looked at her. The topic of that session was, Jesus as Counselor.
My perspective regarding judging others changed that day. I cried out before God and asked Him to give me a heart of consideration and compassion, without which my degree of counseling will be invalid.
Friends! Lets not be judgmental.
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