If you're an addict, and I'd like to include many here (alcohol, drugs, pornography, video games, food, and so on)-basically anything that takes an inordinate amount of your time or that which you do to avoid dealing with reality, which often means dealing with problems-you have probably discovered that you and everyone and anyone else on this earth who has tried to help you can only do so much.
You need to go deeper. Further. Higher.
As addicts, we know of Hope, Honesty, Truth, Personal Accountability, Confession, Change of Heart, Restitution and Reconciliation, but there is more, much more. And it is in this "more" where we finally are able to get the strength we need to overcome our addictions.
Where does this "more" reside? Outside us. Outside our counselors, family, friends, psychiatrists, and psychologists. It resides in God.
We've all heard the phrase "Let go and let God." But what does that really mean? Why rely on God? Are we the weak ones? We're the bad people with the problem that can't be disclosed? We're the only ones who need Him? No. As a matter of fact, as we seek to overcome our addiction we realize we are glad to get closer to Him and see it as a blessing. Many go most their lives not knowing the love and peace they can find there.
In the group that I go to, we often are amazed that what we learn we find beneficial not only to addicts but to all people. If all people brought God into their lives more they would all be closer to Him. But what does that mean, closer to God? Why is getting closer so important?
Specifically, getting closer to God means doing as He desires: being less selfish, better to our spouses, more focused on our children, having a greater desire to not only help ourselves but to reach out to others, to be more honest, to be more trustworthy, to be fully accountable, to be more humble and teachable, to build a life that is dedicated to service, to have greater hope and purpose and to pass on the great Light that we have found and spread it around our world and the world of others as much as we can.
Something that only addicts need? Hardly.
Many in my group have found being there a blessing, not the addiction and its problems but the realization that it was love, deeper love, the deepest love, the love of God that we sought all the time we were in our addictions. We sought His love and its blessings, a releasing of worldly things, getting closer to God, our families, away from selfishness and upward and onward to greater things.
Contrary to popular belief, not all addicts are out on the street destitute and emotionally disabled. In my group there are business owners, a lawyer, college students, a CEO, amongst others. These are people who are there because they are good men. Honorable men. Men who desire change in their lives and have put themselves in the group through thick or thin, coming every week because they want to get better. These are brave men, men who are facing their problems and taking a cold, hard look at themselves, confronting themselves and moving toward improvement.
According to Dr. M. Scott Peck, author of The Road Less Traveled, most people do not take a sustained, honest look at themselves. He states that those who come to him, or a psychiatrist, are in the minority. Few have the courage or desire to work on themselves. And unfortunately, only a small percentage of those who have sought him out stay the required year or two needed to overcome their problem or problems. And these are the people who are more accepting of their problems and are humble enough to listen and work toward a solution from the outset. Those who are reticent take longer, sometimes much longer to overcome the emotional issues that hold them back from growth and a better, more fulfilling life.
The reason why the majority
do not stay is because they discover the amount of work it takes to overcome their emotional issues. According to Peck, everyone needs to overcome something in varying degrees: selfishness, neurosis, personality disorder, narcissism, anger, anxiety, avoidance behavior, and so on. Some hide it well and some convince themselves that they don't have a problem never resolving the issue to live more fulfilling lives. But at times there are emotional downfalls that scream for help and this is when therapy can't be avoided. It ends up that the person must seek therapy or cease living a normal life or, worst case scenario, cease living--the individual taking his life. Unfortunately, this happens far too often, situations that could have been helped and improved with outside assistance, some courage, work and time.
Addiction is not something to be ashamed of. It's not even something that is unusual. According to a recent statistic, 70% of homes in the U.S. house at least one addict. Like the incidents of cancer addiction is growing. There are more and more kids who are getting caught up in online gambling, gaming, and pornography. And of course we know about food addiction. The problem of an overweight society is getting so bad that Congress has stepped in. So if you are addicted or know someone who has an addiction, considering the number who have the problem, there should be little surprised.
Attending meetings is fine. Support is fine. Involving family and friends is fine. But ultimately only a higher power will give you the strength and change of heart needed to overcome the power most addictions hold over us, especially the more serious kind.
God bless.
