It is deep into the night,
weary and desperate, you
decide to get a room in a
lodging so that you can catch
some sleep.
As you move from one cheap
establishment to another the
message is the same: no
available room.
But do not panic. Instead,
talk to the security guard and
you will be surprised that you
can get as many rooms as you
want.
.But you will have taken
part in a scheme to rob the
management as guard or if the
lodging has a beer parlour,
the bartenders pocket the
money.
The major inconvenience is
that you will spend the night
in an unkempt room whose
beddings have been used
repeatedly by different
customers without being
washed. Many of the customers
have sex in the rooms.
According to anecdotes
shared with Crazy Monday by
lodgings attendants, the
no-room-available scheme is
simple.
Short-term clients.
As long as the records show
that a boarding house reached
its capacity daily, the
workers involved know that the
owners will not be able to
prove whether a client stayed
throughout the night or not.
Most do not as they rent the
rooms to indulge in sex for as
little as a few minutes.
When customers are done
they leave the room keys with
the guards who then take
advantage of the situationThe
guards and barmaids monitor
occupancy. When clients check
out they rent out the rooms to
latecomers at a reduced
cost.
We ascend the dark
staircases and find ourselves
facing a woman attendant at
the front desk.
"Any room left madam?" one
of us asks.
"Sorry, we are full. We are
sorry for the inconvenience,"
she politely responds with a
smile.
We are in the process of
seeing ourselves out when a
male guard intercepts us and
introduces himself as Mukwana
though we later learn that his
name is Mr smith.
"No luck boss? That woman
at the reception is confused.
Can I be of any help?" he asks
with a conspiratorial
wink
"Yeah, we needed three
rooms for the night but it
appears there is no space. Can
you direct us to another
facility?" I enquire.
Mukwana reaches into his
coat pocket and fishes out
three keys, each attached to a
small wooden block.
"You only have to pay $2000
instead of $1000 per room," he
whispers.We tell him that
there are no rooms at the
facility but he gives us that
you-naive-souls-look and
whispers:
"Just be quick since the
manager may appear any time.
You will pay me from your
rooms.
"We follow him to the rooms
and true to his word, they are
empty. We pay up but we are
not issued with receipts.
The money goes into the
guard's pockets.
As he hands over the key to
my room, I engage him in
banter to figure out how he is
able to pull off the
scheme.
Mukwana opens up. "We have
a variety of customers. Some
of them only rent the room for
short-time engagements. When
they leave, in the spirit of
playing my brother's
keeper, I help out those in
need. In the end we all win,"
the guard says.
Latecomers
Probed further, he reveals
that the ‘short-term
engagement' is sex. Once
the customers are satiated,
they leave.
Since the rooms are on
offer on a half-board basis
men or women out to satisfy
their sexual urges pay the
full cost and the rooms go
into the records as booked for
the day.
When customers are done
they leave the room keys with
the guards who then takes
advantage of the
situation.
The latecomers have to make
do without necessities like a
tissue paper, a towel and a
piece of soap, which customers
are entitled to.
One hopes the previous
customer did not finish the
tissue paper and soap or make
the towel very dirty.
Some early arrivals are
usually people on transit.
"This type of customers books
into the rooms at around 7pm,
sleep and leave at around
midnight," says Mukwana.
Other customers book a room
before they head for a
drinking spree.
"Some beer lovers book a
room just in case they get too
drunk to go home but many
drink until morning and end up
not needing the room" he
reveals.
Sometimes, the guards pay
people to book into the room
early in the morning and
during the night they use the
room to make money. It is a
smart investment as they make
healthy profits. The schemers
charge $100 an hour"
In the wee hours of the
morning the rooms are cleaned
up and tidied up. The schemers
make sure they remove all
cigarette buts and used
condoms and their wrappings
but the beddings are not
changed so as not to raise the
suspicion of the management,"
Mukwana explains.
It seems the guards and
other workers who collude with
them actually earn more that
their employers.
And sex workers have now
joined in the fray. Some of
them rent a room for the day
then camp in nearby pubs
scouting for customers. "She
returns with her clients to
the rooms and they pay her for
using it on top of her sexual
services," Mukwana
explains.
Some customers book the
rooms for more mundane reasons
like to take a bath, change
clothes and sleep for a few
hours.
"Mostly, they are long
distance truck drivers. They
check into a room, take a bath
and change clothes and relax
for a few hours before they
proceed on with their safaris.
They leave the rooms
relatively clean," he
says. |
