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Denial is a natural state of mind it seems, since I've known so many people who are in it, myself, at one time, included. Dad drinks too much but he's my hero, he knows what he's doing. Denial. Mom hides bottles of vodka around the house, but so what, she needs to unwind, too. Denial. My brother only drinks when he gets upset. Denial. It's his wife's fault anyway, double denial. I have a couple of drinks every night to calm my body, until I can fall asleep, three's my limit. Denial. My husband has a few beers every night while he watches sports, but he doesn't have a problem, he's been doing it for fifteen years! Never missed a night! Denial. I didn't have anything to eat before I started drinking, you know that makes it go right to your head. Denial.
If you find yourself making excuses for the amount of alcohol you consume, people are noticing your drinking habits. If you always have a 12 pack in the fridge, and drink from the time you come home until the time you go to bed, you may have a problem. If your husband or wife, mother or sister, friend or brother, talk to you about their concerns over your drinking, than you need to take their feelings into consideration. No one can see a drunk better than the people who are watching them, and no one can deny the truth like the drunk themselves. Sometimes it takes weeks, months, years to convince a drunk that they need help, and sometimes, they never decide to go for it.
Whenever a situation about drinking comes up within a family, or group of people, about someone they all care about and are concerned with, then an intervention is a good idea. Everyone gets together, someone brings the person with the perceived problem, which is usually quite true or they wouldn't be going through the trouble or threat of removal of acquaintance to the alcohol challenged person. They try to get the person to see how alcohol is affecting their lives in a negative way, and also their families.
There may be physical or emotional abuse that is talked about, and how there are ways to address those situations and make them better. They may be advised to go to a twelve step program, and some may even be threatened that if they don't go, they can go somewhere else to live. They may also need to listen to the fact that they may need psychiatric help, and maybe seeing a therapist isn't such a bad idea. Between the two, the person with the alcohol problem receives plenty of help to quit and live a good, honest, humble life, if they follow certain rules, and conduct their lives in a positive, giving and sober way.
Intervention is never a wasted experience. Even if the person in need doesn't stop, the seeds are planted, and sometime they grow into common sense and faith, and alcohol is left alone. Denial is unacceptable, excuses mean nothing, and whoa is me, just ain't. We all have problems, all diversified, and yet, we may feel about our daughter going off to college just as alone and empty and scared as our neighbor who just found out they had cancer. These traumas don't mean we need to escape from our reality and drink ourselves to death. I knew a woman once. She came into the program, and we immediately hit it off. She had a beautiful farmhouse on a lot of property, back in the woods. She and her husband had enough money to live comfortably, and she didn't have to work.
She kept her home spotless, and I know that was a lot of work. She drank, as did her husband. She had one son in California, she was in Jersey, and her other son had been murdered two years before I met her. Somebody hit him over the head in one town, they took him to the hospital, the hospital let him go, he went to my friend's house to recuperate, ad she was making him tea downstairs when she heard a thud. She went upstairs and he was lying on the floor, never regained consciousness, and she had to make the decision to pull the plug. Her drinking accelerated after that, she didn't care if she lived or died. Finally, she came into the meetings. For a while she was doing pretty good. Then, she slipped, and there was no turning back. She even came to a meeting drunk, and another couple drove behind me in her car, we took her home, then we went back to the meeting.
She called me drunk often, and I would have to tell her I couldn't talk to her under those conditions, but my heart went out to her. Well, I didn't see her for a while, and I was at a restaurant ad the waitress who knew this woman and I, told me she had died. Liver failure. Something shot through me, and I was very sad. This poor soul couldn't live, so she drank herself to death. There had never been an intervention. I wonder what would have happened had there been?
If you know this article applies to you, do the intervention, or you will be sitting in your dining room fondly remembering a good person who just couldn't take life. Intervention is a tool to take seriously. It's a waste of a couple of hours if it doesn't work, we all have a couple of hours to try to help a loved one, and the best that can happen is they can realize they need help, and make and stick to a plan to get some. I so wish we had one for the beautiful woman with the blonde hair.
i'm glad you enjoyed the article, and i appreciate you taking the time to read and comment. as long as there are words, i'll be using them to inspire and encourage others,
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