Well the time is now for the showing of "!`m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here," however it should be more like, "I`m A Nobody Get Me In There Quick" after seeing Simon Webb from the band Blue and the lovable Joe Swash out of Eastenders both revving up for their first Bush Tucker Trial. Each to their own I say, and these are two reasons why I will yet again watch another reality TV show. Where the word reality comes from is beyond me. In reality what people in the right frame of mind volunteers to sleep with venomous snakes, poisonous toads and rabid rats - and then eat their testicles after. This is a far cry from someone who is sane. In saying that if the price is right is there room in the jungle for me.
!`m A Celebrity Get Me out Of Here is televised in the heart of the Australian jungle and should you want to get out you cannot without having to face a bush tucker trial alone without the help of experts. In a nut shell you are a prisoner. Watching the program over the past years it is hard to tell what the jungle inhabitants fear the most, starvation, creepy crawlies or fellow camp mates (and "camp" it's full of this time round.) !`m A Celebrity Get Me out Of Here has seen couples marry - seen couples in a long relationship separate and seen more fall outs between people that you would never have believed could turn the air blue with their cursing. This proves that all who enter the jungle are human after all. If the heat is on and pressure rises it is then the celebrities show their true side to their personality - which in return helps us the viewer decide on who is worthy of being crowned king or queen of the jungle.
I must say I thoroughly enjoyed the opening of I`m A Celebrity Get Me out Of Here where contestants without wings dropped into the jungle from the sky, or had to ski across swamp infested waters. Simon Webbe and Joe Swash went head to head on the first bush tucker challenge. Winner of the challenge and team mates were to eat that night. Although their shirts burst at the seams caused by protruding muscles these two what I believed he-men should have worn blouses. There was more screaming from these two than that of Dani Behr and Carly Zucker who dangling in a glass capsule at over 200 feet had the task of releasing all sorts of insects over them, and did they flinch, no chance girl power prevailed. Dani had the edge over Carly by a split second. Because of this and sadly for the second night running Simon Webbes team nibble yet again on rice and beans while the opposition feast on bangers mash and roast chicken. How can these people denied food possibly find the strength to go on and win a bush tucker trial if it involves a test of lasting stamina? Simons team, and only into the second day appear now of skeletal frame. At least Nicola tonight gets to eat well, - maybe not a menu to suit her palette however, the much needed nourishment she needs to win her this trial. Joe Swash was nominated her opponent. Nicola can sail through this trial if she uses her head i.e. using to her advantage her boobs, after all Joe is a red hot blooded male. Had it been George Takei or Brian Paddick across the dining table then more difficult for Nicola to sway, as no boob men they are?
Well the bush tucker trial between these two has gone head to head - and has to be the most entertaining part of the whole program since all celebrities entered the jungle. Give Nicola her due she did more baulking than talking, and Joe not only brought tears to his own eyes eating witchety grubs but to mine as well, however not a morsel left on the plate. They both did well with Nicola taking lead over Joe after he passed up, aside from throwing up, the offer to digest birds feet.
Here are the fearsome 10 celebrities who will treat us to great "Viewing or Spewing."
1 Carly Zucker - Partner of Chelsea footballer Joe Cole - Can she match his staying power
2 Esther Ranzten - All time television favorite with a grin to take anything on the chin
3 Not so "posh" Joe Swash - Will this get him the crown
4 Nicola McLean - Page three girl has two good reasons for lasting in the jungle
5 Robert Kilroy-Silk - Former chat show host why? - is he Kilroy or a Kiljoy
6 Simon Webbe - Sings the Blues after losing his first bush tucker trial
7 Martina Navratilova - A hardy woman - Will the ball be in her court this year
8 Brian Paddick - Ex Metropolitan Police commander - What a gay day fellow inmates, oops camp mates, oops everyone
9 George Takei - Best known as Star Trek's Mir Sulu. Will he stay or ask Scotty to beam him up
10 Dani Behr - Original wag
Without doubt TV's toughest reality show but not tough enough to scare Busted singer Matt Willis Tony Blackburn, Phil Tufnell, Kerry Katona, Joe Pasquale and Carol Thatcher previous winners of !`m A Celebrity Get Me out Of Here. And last year's well deserving winner of I'm A Celebrity... Get Me Out of Here! 2007* was the much loved Christopher Biggins.
Good luck to all but do I hear a lion (king) emerging from the jungle 2008 with a "Cockney Roar."
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