"It's what's in the heart that counts."
That's true especially for the person saying it, and for few others who take time to look past the outside of the person speaking those words.
But for the vast majority of people, "what's in the heart" matters not much, not obviously. And it is these normal people that you may have to live with and relate to most of your life. So it matters what they think of you. If how they see you differs greatly from how you see yourself, you may have a serious problem.
While "God looks at the heart", people do not see your heart. People look at you, unless they are visually impaired or legally blind.
That means your personality is a big deal. By "personality", I mean all that goes into making you the you that you are. Does that make sense? It's the way you come across to people. What people see of you. How you look. How you sound. Your appearance. Your demeanor.
Personality includes all those areas that go into your personal development. Your personality starts with your thinking, how you think, what you think about. How do you see life in general? Do you live with optimism, hope, expecting better things for yourself?
Humor is a power tool for vamping up personality. How's your sense of humor? Does it irritate you to see or hear a happy person? How often do you smile? And do you laugh just a little bit or a lot? How often do you laugh? I mean giggle, laugh so hard sometimes until you shake all over, or until your eyes tear up? To help your laughability, you may want to seek one good laugh of the day' everyday. For that, you can subscribe to a daily joke website. Some of these websites will email you their joke of the day. Also, don't overlook the funny little things that happen around you daily. Often in your own house. Or the funny things that you do. Yes, laugh at yourself. It's far better than having others laugh at you. If fact, develop such a fond sense of humor that empowers you to laugh with anyone who laughs at you.
Attitude is a huge part of your personality. Remember that saying, "Your attitude determines your altitude"? Well, it's very much true. An ugly attitude can sink you as fast as a great attitude can drive you to the top.
Emotional balance is an attitudinal ingredient. How's your temper or temperament? How much does it take for someone to trip you and cause you to get angry enough to blow up? Have you given people the impression that you have some hot buttons' they can push? If so, you've given people a remote control. And they'll push your buttons at will, expecting you to act the fool when they want you to. If you can't control your feelings, especially madness or sadness, people will manipulate you, play you until you self-destruct, or shoot yourself in the foot, just for the fun of it, their fun, not yours.
Confidence level. Big personality issue. What do you think of yourself? How confident are you? Do you have courage to face the challenges that life brings? Are you bold or timid? Confidence often decides who gets picked for a role in a play, drama, commercial print, television show, or movie.
You may not realize it, but your education or level of enlightenment can affect your personality. Do you need to enhance your speaking or writing ability, so you can express yourself better? That's the education that really matters, not necessarily a high IQ. When you speak, is there enough meat there for anyone to want to listen? This includes your ability to communicate effectively. Check your grammar, a correct use of nouns and verbs. You may need to take a quick class to help you communicate better in your primary language. That's practical education that makes a difference in the real world.
And for a great attitude, pay attention to your core beliefs, which form the basis for your morals and ethics. It is true: what you really believe is how you really behave. What you consider right or wrong can shape your personality and personal development. Not many people will consider a crook a great personality. Virtues like fairness, kindness, forgiveness, generosity, humility, discipline, and determination can do wonders for a winning personality. How? These core moral values serve as the invisible engine that powers you from the inside.
Yes, in a way, "It's what's on the inside that counts". But only if what's on the inside shows on the outside too. It makes little difference to say, "I'm a happy person," or, "I'm really a good person at heart", if all people see is a long face. If all they hear is a bad mouth. If all they notice of you are sticky hands that take what belongs to others, or constant attempts to cheat someone else.
To impress the difference that personality makes, take two applicants for a job. One has a PhD, with gabs of work experience to go with it. But when he comes to the job interview, the interviewer from Human Resources finds the PhD to be smug and frowny. Now take the other applicant. The only degree she has is ADD or worse ADHD, with a GED and some limited work experience. But this girl has a bright smile with an upbeat attitude that lights up the room.
If you were sitting in the HR chair, to which of these job applicants would you likely offer the job? To the one with ADD, of course! On what basis? Primarily on the basis of personality, and your company would applaud your judgment.
This scenario plays out everyday at places of employment around the world. Often the decision to hire or fire comes right down to who has a better, brighter personality, not necessarily who's best or most qualified in terms of credentials. Oten who gets to date or marry that beautiful, handsome or well-off person has to do with who has the better, brighter personality. So buff off your personality. It might just brighten your future, besides making you an all-around better person to be with and be around. You can never lose with a winning personality.
