I don't believe in climate change
Or in the dangers of passive smoke
I don't believe that guns can kill
Or the economy is going broke
I don't believe in mental illness
Or people who don't believe in God
I don't believe in evolution
Or that horses should be shod
I don't think we should immunise
Or rape victims be allowed to choose
I don't believe the world is round
Or that it's safe to eat genetic food
But I do believe in burning witches
And sending them straight to hell
And I do believe in using torture
If it stops a tyrants spell
I do believe in taxing taxes
And running cars on gas
And I do believe in beating seals
And watching their last gasp
I do believe in terrorists
And giving up my rights
I do believe in paying more
To let others live in fright
Now you may say that there is hunger
And that we have a part to play
But I assure you, my girth is growing
For I eat well, every single day
You may say that child labour
Is a cruel and moral wrong
But check out my new nike's
They were going for a song
You may say the water's rising
That it's impossible to miss
But I truly do not see it
For my ignorance is bliss...