Is the man in your life insensitive? I've often heard women describe males as insensitive. Sometimes they are talking about men they share their lives with but more often they are referring to males in general. As a psychologist/therapist I can assure you that there are some highly sensitive males around and some pretty insensitive women.
Sensitivity exists along a continuum like introversion/extroversion. In other words no one is completely outgoing or completely inward looking. People's introversion/extroversion can be measured on a scale with many individuals close to the middle. Those with more outgoing personalities will be placed closer to the to the extroversion end of the scale and the more inward looking individuals closer to the introvert end.A similar scale exists which psychologists use to test sensitivity.
You may be thinking that males behave in a less sensitive manner than females. You have my agreement up to a point. I don't necessarily think that males in general are less sensitive to the needs and feelings of others than females.In a way men can be less sensitive to their own feelings or certainly some of their feelings.Males may have difficulty in showing feelings which they are feeling intensely.
Generally speaking it is less acceptable for males to express sadness in public than females although this is changing. Most men particularly; Many men particularly British men have been told when growing up that it's unmanly to wear their heart on their sleeve.This does not mean that they don't have good hearts.I have often heard the assumption voiced that men in blue-collar occupations, plumbers, carpenters, electricians etc are insensitive. Of the blue collar males that I see in my practice many are sensitive and highly intelligent. It's all too easy to make assumptions.
The other myth that I frequently hear about males is that they are always confident.No they are not. Males in most societies are brought up to display confidence even when they don't feel it. Interestingly as a psychologist/therapist when I hear men speak about confidence they generally say how confident other males appear to be.
In particular most men find asking us out difficult. It's a blow to their ego if we say "no". This is why men very often talk around the subject when they would like to ask for a date. Knowing this means we can hear when we are about to be asked out by listening for clues such as "ABC film has had really good reviews, have you seen it?" We can then facilitate the date that we both want with replies that will encourage him to proceed with asking for the date. You could say " yes'I have heard that it is a very good film". I haven't seen it yet but I would like to".
--------
Want to understand males better? Eileen is a psychologist who went from disaster to success in her personal relationships by applying the insights of psychology. Now she's passionate about helping you to do the same. You can learn more from her website http://www.eileenedwards.co.uk . Claim your free Love Magnet report by emailing eileen@eileenedwards.co.uk
Disclaimer: All information on this site is provided for informational purposes only! By no means is any
information presented herein intended to substitute for the advice provided to you by any health care or other professional
or organization.
tweet this!