Deciding to have or not to have sex together is a very personal and important decision in a new relationship. Do what you like, but here is what I know- fools rush in! Many people feel social pressures of "Sex in the City" types of relationships. That's TV. This is your life! First, you must decide if you are looking for a long-term relationship, or a short-term fling. That can guide your sexual decisions and actions. In the meantime, here are five love tips for you to review. I hope they will help you.
Love Tip 1: Men don't respect women who are too sexually available too soon. Women don't like men who are too pushy.
No matter what your date might say, men are taught to think poorly of women who have sex with them too soon. Women do not like to be pressured, and most men don't either.
Love Tip 2: Take your time and enjoy the ride!
There are so many fun things you can do- kissing, fooling around with your clothes on, etc. Enjoy the buildup! Dating is a process of getting to know each other. Ask yourself if the chemistry is there, if you enjoy one another's company, if this is a person that you enjoy on many levels. The more compatible you are, the better the sex is likely to be. After all, anticipation is half the fun!
Love Tip 3: Be safe, be sure and be healthy!
It is important that you and your partner get health tested for STDs first. This protects you and them more. Still use condoms and precautions because you never know. If you feel too embarrassed to talk about STDs or safer sex, then maybe it's too soon to be naked with the other person sharing the most intimate moments. Muster up the courage to have an open conversation about safer sex and testing. Safe sex gives you peace of mind and body.
Love Tip 4: I would say never have sex on the first date. This is a bad idea because of love tip #1. Ideally, I recommend waiting at least a month or two before having intercourse. Some may not like this or think it's stupid, but think about it- when you have sex with someone it can be so powerful. Do you want to fall in love with Mr. or Ms. Right or Wrong? You need to consider if you are emotionally ready to take that next step.
Love Tip 5: If all you are looking for is a one night stand, then go for the sex right away. Just be careful and have the safest sex you can. Have fun- there's no judgment here!
If the person that you are looking for is any good for you, they will respect you enough to wait for you to be ready physically and emotionally. There is an emotional component to sexuality and sensuality that can either bring us so close together in bliss or leave us heartbroken. Since there are no hard and fast rules about sex, you will need to create your own. Stick to them and you will be glad that you did!
» left by Dr. Mark from San Antonio (5 hours 34 minutes ago.) New Comment!
How about some advice to avoid it completely..at least until in a deep mature (early twenties minimally) relationship leading to something permament. Maybe there would less trauma and guilt throughout many people's lives if they followed a narrow (not neccessarily religious) road and remained chaste as long as possible. Imagine, when a young person approaches this behavior not as a hormone laden teenager, but as a more mature individual that will have less BAGGAGE to carry into their marriage. I am a psychologist and can guarantee to the young women reading this that your sexual past, when you meet "Mr. Right"...WILL matter to him (as "unfair" as it sounds). The 'boyfriend" that is telling you that "it's cool" or "your past doesn't matter" is merely manipulating you into a poor decision for the satisfaction of his "needs". He is not likely to care about how you will feel about satisfying his needs in a year or two from the act and cares even less about the guilt (especially if you were raised with traditional values, values may go dormant in late teen years, but they have a way of resurfacing as we enter or approach marriage) you may very well feel. Males are programmed (have been for about 2.5 milllion years) to spread their seed as far and wide as possible, with little concern for the consequences. The man who chooses a wife, like the man who chooses a new car (not to objectify women but to prove a point) will possibly accept one that has been test driven a few times...but will always prefer one that only he (even if before marriage) has steered.
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