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Falling in love is a wonderful thing, but what happens when you or your partner start falling out of love? And how do you know if that's what's happening?
It's not uncommon for couple to run into bumpy patches in a relationship, especially if they've been together any length of time but it's important to know what signs to watch for so you know when things are and will be ok or when you need to step up, take control and work together towards making the relationship work.
Do you seem to become irritated around your partner for no particular reason? Do they seem to become agitated around you and you aren't sure why?
Has it become difficult to carry on a conversation with your partner? Long, awkward silences where neither of you seem to have anything to talk about?
Do certain special places or situations you used to find emotionally rewarding now cause you some discomfort? Maybe a place where you used to walk, hold hands and talk for hours that you now wish to avoid?
Have you started keeping your feelings about them to yourself or get irritated when they try and share their feelings about you or your relationship?
Have you started finding reasons to be away from your partner more often? Like working late when you really don't have to, spending more time away with the children or friends? Have you noticed if they've been away more than is normal for your relationship?
Do you sometimes lie to your partner about where you are going or what you are doing to avoid being around them? Have you caught your partner lying to you about where they have been or what they've been doing?
If you answered yes to lying about where you've been or what you've been doing, do you feel any burden of guilt about lying to your partner?
Have you or your partner done anything that may have caused serious damage to the trust in your relationship, like being unfaithful or being caught in a substantial lie?
Do you find your mind wandering off when your partner is communicating with you?
Does your relationship leave your feeling restless or bored?
Do you find yourself flirting overtly in a way which is out of the norm for you?
Does thinking about your partner when you're not with them give you positive feelings, negative feelings or no feelings either way?
Answering yes to some or even all of the questions above doesn't mean that your relationship has to be over, it just means that you need to do a little soul searching and be honest with yourself about your feelings.
Having been married for the last 13 yrs, I can say with certainty that no relationship that lasts that long is without it's ups and downs. The real question is are you willing to put in the effort to make it work?
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