This list of Humorous Thanksgiving Quotes will help you survive...I mean celebrate this wonderful holiday. The Thanksgiving celebration takes place each year on the fourth Thursday of November. Some of the most notable aspects of this special holiday include...hours of food preparation, overeating, overdrinking, football and those long-lost relatives you only see once a year.
This list of Humorous Thanksgiving Quotes will help you cope with the chaos that often accompanies this holiday. Instead of getting stressed out...have a good laugh with these funny Thanksgiving quotes.
12 Humorous Thanksgiving Quotes
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #1
Thanksgiving, man! Not a good day to be my pants.
Kevin James
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #2
Thanksgiving is an emotional holiday. People travel thousands of miles to be with people they only see once a year. And then discover once a year is way too often.
Johnny Carson
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #3
My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.
Phyllis Diller
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #4
I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.
Jon Stewart
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #5
Thanksgiving is so called because we are all so thankful that it only comes once a year.
P.J. O'Rourke
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #6
My mother is such a lousy cook that Thanksgiving at her house is a time of sorrow.
Rita Rudner
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #7
I love Thanksgiving turkey... it's the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.
Arnold Schwarzenegger
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #8
What we're really talking about is a wonderful day set aside on the fourth Thursday of November when no one diets. I mean, why else would they call it Thanksgiving?
Erma Bombeck
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #9
Coexistence... what the farmer does with the turkey - until Thanksgiving.
Mike Connolly
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #10
Here I am 5 o'clock in the morning stuffing bread crumbs up a dead bird's butt.
Roseanne Barr
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #11
Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.
Erma Bombeck
Humorous Thanksgiving Day Quotes #12
An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.
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