Kids lying don't necessarily have a serious problem. Indeed, most kids lie at least once. What is very important is to define what kind of lies your kid tells. That way you can know how serious this is. It of course also depends on your child's age.
Basically, there are two reasons why kids are lying. First, they have a strong imagination and are making up stories. Second, they lie out of fear of being punished or yelled at when they know they did something wrong.
Kids lying problem is a bit tricky because it appears on different levels in children behavior. But there are different things you can do to help your child get rid of this behavior:
Don't give your child a chance to lie . In other words, don't ask what you already know. If your child obviously took a cookie even though he wasn't allowed to, don't ask: "Did you take a cookie?". You'll push your kid to lie. Just say: "You have chocolate smears on your mouth. I told you not to take a cookie and you did it anyway without asking me!"
When your child lies to you and you know he does, don't get angry, you'll make your child lie more. The fear of your angry reaction is exactly the reason why your child is lying to you. Listening and keeping your voice down is very important to understand the causes and be able to help your child stop lying. It's also a better way to get the truth.
Kids lying to draw attention by making up stories have to be handled differently. Indeed, very imaginative children shouldn't be neglected. You need to make the difference between reality and fiction very clear. You can take TV and books as examples of what is real and what is pretended. Also, it's a good idea to set aside times for imaginary play with dress-up costumes and accessories to differentiate fiction from reality without bridling his imagination.
It's important that you make truth and honesty a major principle in your family and education. Kids lying by habit often over-predict their parents' reaction. That is why it's very important that you provide clear boundaries but insist on the fact that they are negotiable and that it's always better to tell the truth rather than a lie in the long run.
Give your child the chance to reconsider his answer after saying an obvious lie and tell him there will be no consequences if he tells the truth right now. Reward honesty. Reverse the process: if you "catch" your child telling the truth, he'll be rewarded with something he likes doing. He'll soon see the good consequences of being honest.
Kids lying need an extra attention and help and don't need to be yelled at. It's difficult to measure the seriousness of such a problem. You might be interested by other parenting solutions, especially if the lying problem isn't the only one you're facing with your child or if it's a compulsive behavior. I'd like to recommend a website called www.YourParentingHelp.com. It's a very friendly website created by a group of parents who decided to make a selection of the best parenting programs they tested. They bring a real message of hope and the reviews really help see clearly how each program can help you. It did help me and I'm glad to share this resource and those tips with you. I hope it'll help you! Kids lying problem is not a fatality!
Disclaimer: All information on this site is provided for informational purposes only! By no means is any
information presented herein intended to substitute for the advice provided to you by any health care or other professional
or organization.
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