‘Tis the season…the wedding season, that is. Statistics show that June is the most
popular month in which to get married in the United States. The average cost of a wedding is now over $22,000! With people more anxious than ever to make
their “special day" even more special and unique, either our pockets have to
get deeper or our credit limit has to get larger. Or not. If your son or
daughter is about to take the big step of tying the knot but you have a limited
budget, here are some things you can do to help make their day memorable
without having to break your bank.
Let The Kids Do It Themselves!
I couldn’t be more serious about this one. We’ve seen it in movies and on TV, and heard
horror stories about it from friends.
Parents and future in-laws won’t let the young bride and groom plan
their own wedding, but take total control, scheduling the wedding date,
ordering invitations, reserving the locations for the wedding service and reception,
and choosing the caterer and menu for the reception. The nicest thing you can do for your child is to take your hands
off her wedding and let her experience the pleasure (and the frustration) of
doing everything herself. You’ll be
giving the young couple memories of the entire planning process that will last
them a lifetime. If you want to plan a
wedding that badly, then agree with your spouse to renew your wedding vows and
plan that ceremony together, or take the next logical step and become a professional
wedding planner (sorry, your kids are still off-limits!).
Create a Personal Wedding Song
As a songwriter, I had a golden opportunity to give my older
daughter something for her wedding that few others could give: I wrote a song for her wedding. I recorded it ahead of time and the
recording was played after I walked her down the aisle. You might not have songwriting talent, but
you can certainly write down your memories of your child as you approach the
wedding day. Then check in the local yellow
pages or on-line for songwriters who would be willing to take your thoughts and
put them into a one-of-a-kind song. If
you know someone who writes music, you might even approach him with your words
and negotiate to see if he’d be willing to do this at reduced cost (or for
free!) as part of the couple’s wedding gift.
The finished product can be sung during the ceremony, or at the
reception afterwards. Either way, be
sure to have someone record the performance.
You and your kids will want to play this one over and over again.
Give a “Community Gift"
Want to get the happy couple a really big gift, but simply
can’t afford the cost? Consider setting
up a “wedding fund" where people can contribute to, and be acknowledged for, a
large-ticket item. This might be
especially nice for the couple who have been out on their own for awhile and
already have the staples that make up a new home (small appliances, linens,
silverware, etc.). Why give another set
of bronze candleholders when you can help purchase a two-week cruise in the
Bahamas? Which do you think the
newlyweds will appreciate more?
Make a Wedding Journal
If you’re handy with a camera, take some candid photos of
the bride and groom from the early planning stages through the Big Day. Tag along and take pictures as the bride is
fitted for her gown, the wedding cake is selected, and the invitations are
mailed out. The day of the wedding be
sure to get pictures of all phases of the event, before, during, and after the
ceremony, and at the reception as well.
Give disposable cameras to members of the wedding party and have them
take pictures as they see fit. Once
you’ve collected those cameras, take all that film in to be developed, pick
your favorite pictures from the pile, and combine them into a scrapbook for the
newlyweds. You can display pictures and
include comments based on your viewpoint of the process or theirs. It’s a great way to help remind the couple
of all the good things that led up to their wedding day. Oh, and don’t throw out the photos you
didn’t use in the scrapbook. Put them
in envelopes and give them to the couple as well. One person’s bad shot is another person’s cherished memory.
Create a Wedding Memories DVD
The day of the wedding have somebody run the video camera
who has some experience and knows what she’s doing. You could go with a professional on this one, or utilize the
services of a trusted friend or associate.
After recording all the important aspects of pre- and post-ceremony and
reception, you can take the video along with still photos and music from the
ceremony to a service company that can combine the photos, video, and music
into a DVD. Or, if you have a friend or
family member who has computer experience and knows how to run some of the
multimedia functions included with the latest PC or Mac operating systems, you
may be able to help create it yourself.
It takes a little longer, and you may have to learn how some of the
software works, but the up side is that you have more input in, and control
over, the creative process. And the
very best part: It’s easy to make
copies!
You’ve been given a few ideas on inexpensive, creative ways
to make your child’s wedding memorable.
Think about it for yourself and I’m sure you can come up with others
that will be even more meaningful to your son or daughter. While you’re doing your special addition to
their special day, remember to have fun with it. Getting married is stressful.
Have a little bit of fun with it.
Enjoy the process!
Additional sources for this article include the National Association
of Wedding Ministers.
