Lately I've felt like I talk too much. If you met me face-to-face you wouldn't say that, I'm sure, because normally I'm thought of as an introvert. If I feel really comfortable with you, you don't think of me as an introvert, but this is a rare occasion.
Online it's a different story. Some say it's a boldness felt from hiding behind an online user name, though online I usually go by my real name of Bruce Horst. My heritage is German, raised in a Mennonite religious community which values action over speech. Even still I often I think one spends one's first 18 years learning habits, and the rest of one's life unlearning them. And I'm 46.
Because of my religious upbringing, I didn't get much credit for 'thinking outside of the box'. Frankly, my way of thinking was never approved of by my parents or the people around me.
It's for this reason that I feel compelled to tell others that I approve of them. Yeah, call it a handicap, or a psychological disorder, but when I see someone who doesn't perfectly fit in, I feel compelled to encourage them, to let them know I approve of them. It's the least that I can do. This has lead me to some interesting situations.
Do you think it's easy in today's society to believe that everyone deserves a basic level of health care, or that the poor should have a minimum standard at which they live? I'll spare you and won't even go there, but I will say that having such basic values will get you hated by many. Especially the religious who supposedly believe they have what they have because of 'grace'.
Let's just say that if you're a good person, if you do good things, things that make other's lives better, I approve of you. I think you're great, I think you are a hero in the world we live in. And you are rare.
If you are a person who likes to talk about what is evil and what is good, but who doesn't actually make the lives of others better? I think you're probably fooling yourself. And I feel sorry for you. Most of the people I know are like this.
I get tired of talking like this, and I'm sure that many others get tired of reading these things that I write. So what should I do? I'm not sure what I can do. This is who I am, and it's what I do.